Fall Jokes

Jack and Jill went up the hill to catch some pale of water Jack come down and then Jill came tumbling after so they had a baby...

ur a bish and yu are too

Five little monkeys jumping on the bed.

One fell of and bumped his head

The momma called the doctor and the doctor said

Why the heck was my children jumping on a bed.

3 men walk into heaven at the same time. they all live in the same city. god asks the first man "how did you die?" the man says "I have a heart condition and iv'e been suspecting my wife of cheating for some time. anyway I get how from work and I see my wife on the bed and a man hang of the balcony. I get so mad and stomp on the guys fingers! he falls into a bush so I throw a refrigerator on him." God asks the next man "how did you die?" the man says I was cleaning the windows and then this crazy man starts stomping on my fingers! luckily I fall safely in a bush! but then a refrigerator falls on me!" god asks the third man he says" I was the one in the fridge!"

How do you know when Helen Keller is home? Answer; When you hear somebody falling down the stairs!

The clock struck one! Then down did come! Hickory dickory doc What am I? Random- a mouse? Me- no dumb $hit! Random- what is it? Me- the gillotine!

Dad: "if they jumped off a bridge would you?" Tommy: "yes, cuz there would be a body pile to break my fall!"

How do you make someone in Africa disappointed

Sing raindrops keep falling on my head

Two guys watching a war movie at a Bar are talking , one says to the other. " The Nazi's starved my dad to death in a concentration camp during the war". The other says " my Dad died in a camp as well...he broke his neck" First guy says " how did he break his neck?" Second guy says " He fell out of the Guard Tower".

Me: Wanna play 9/11? Friend: What's that? Me: Its a game where I kick you in both legs and watch you fall.

Who says ‘white men cant jump’ they certainly did when the twin towers were falling

What was the last thing going through the minds of the people who jumped out of the buildings during 9/11?

Their ankles.

A fly is 6 inches above water and a fish sees it and it leaps out and gets the fly then a bear garbs the fish and eats it, then a hunter shot the bear and a mouse saw some crackers and then leaped on the cracker and ate it then a cat runs down to get the mouse trips and falls into the water and that's the story of how six inches can get a pussy wet.

There were these three men, their names were Shit, Shut up, and Manners. One day they were riding in their car and Shit fell out so Manners went out to pick shit up and shut up went to the police station. when he got there the police officer said "What's your name son?" and Shut up said "Shut up." the officer replies with "Ummm...excuse me?!" and shut up said "Shut up!" and the officer said "Boy, where are your manners?" and Shut up said "Round the corner picking up Shit!"

What do friends and trees have in common? They both fall down when you hit them with an axe.

Friend: Want to play fall guys?

Friend 2: Yup

Friend: Ok so let me ju- wait where are you going?

Friend 2: I'm gonna jump off

Friend: Why?

Friend 2: We are playing Fall Guys, right?

A cop pulls a guy over for suspected drunk driving. The cop opens the door and the driver falls out onto the asphalt. The cop says, "Holy shit, you're so drunk, you can't even walk!"

The drunk says, "No shit, that's why I took my car!"

How do you get a Koala to fall asleep? Sing a koala-by.

A young peasant coming from the field with his scythe on his shoulder notices an attractive young woman that was doing the laundry in a mountain stream, perched on some rocks near a waterfall. The guy stops and leans against his scythe, fascinated by the young girl's beauty. After minutes of watching her, she loses her balance, slips on a rock and falls all the way down, crushing her head on the white rocks. Thoughtful, he puts his scythe back on his shoulder and walks away, saying to himself "Damn, another washing machine destroyed by limestone!".