Fall jokes
You know how bad of a person you are when you figure out how long you wait to smash. For me and my girlfriend, it was between the first plane crash and the last tower falling.
"Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.... All the king's horses and all the king's men, COULDN'T PUT HUMPTY TOGETHER AGAIN."
"Rock-a-bye, baby on the treetop when the wind blows the cradle will rock when the bough breaks the cradle will fall and down will come baby cradle and all
Rock-a-bye, baby on the treetop when the wind blows the cradle will rock
when the bough breaks the cradle will fall and down will come baby cradle and all"
Anyone else finding the hidden horror in these?
Why did the boy drop his ice cream?
He got hit by a bus.
I love fire. My friends love it too. When I set them on fire, they run around and scream. They sometimes get so tired they immediately fall asleep forever. Also, they need a shower.
Why did the man fall into a well? He couldn’t see that well.
Memes
What's the difference between a golfer and a skydiver?
A golfer goes *whack* "darn" and a skydiver goes "darn" *whack.*
Why does a leaf fall faster than an emo kid? Because the emo hangs itself.
Even if there was no gravity, I'd still fall for you.
I may not be as "rich" as Donald Trump, but at least I am still allowed to go on holiday to Bali, Niagara Falls, Hong Kong, and the Pyramids of Giza.
Orange Jesus can't travel to these places because these places cannot grant entry to felons.
...ah, who am I kidding? It's likely that Trump is going to prison, anyway.
There was once a man from Peru. Who fell asleep in a canoe. While dreaming of Venus, He played with his penis, And awoke with a hand full of goo.
Why do people want to jump off buildings?
Because they want to become Superman.
what do you call a cow that fell?
Ground beef.
What falls and never gets hurt? Snow.
Did you know that Americans fall out of both sides of the bed?
If the shoe fits perfectly, why did it fall off?
When your mom fell down, a 10 magnitude earthquake shook the Earth.
Fall
If you drop an apple and an emo girl, who falls first?
The apple, because the emo girl hung herself.
What falls down the building and doesn't get up again?
An emo.
If a blonde and a brunette jump off a building, who would hit the ground first?
The brunette, because the blonde would have to stop and ask for directions!