What would you call the Eiffel Tower if it falls over? The I Fell Tower!
Give a man a plane ticket, he’ll fly for a day. Push a man out of a plane flying 10,000 miles up, he’ll fly for the rest of his life.
I may not be as "rich" as Donald Trump, but at least I am still allowed to go on holiday to Bali, Niagara Falls, Hong Kong, and the Pyramids of Giza.
Orange Jesus can't travel to these places because these places cannot grant entry to felons.
...ah, who am I kidding? It's likely that Trump is going to prison, anyway.
Johnny is very attached to his parents. He asks to take a shower with her when she gets in. He looks down and asks, "What's that?" The mother replies, "That's my garage." He looks up and asks, "What are those?" The mother responds, "Those are my headlights."
He then goes and takes a shower with his dad. He looks down, "Daddy, what's that?" The dad replies, "That's my car." He goes to sleep that night and wakes up because of a bad dream. He goes and tells his mother and she says, "You can lay with me." He falls fast asleep then wakes up once more because of falling off the bed. He gets back up and gets under the covers. Then he feels the bed moving. He looks under the covers to investigate and sees them going at it. He then yells, "Mommy, turn on you're headlights, Daddy's parking his car in you're garage!" *THUD*
Why did Timmy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.
Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.
I will always remember my dad's last words....
"15 dollars and I'll jump."
Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone chucked a brick at her.
Why did Sally throw a clock out the window? She had brain damage from the brick.
Yo mama is so fat that when she fell, I didn't laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.
My wife went to Niagara Falls and fell. She broke every bone in her body.
One year later, she recovered. She slipped on an orange peel and died.
I was a sit-down comedian, then I tried to stand up. I fell.
I wished I stayed in the wheelchair.
Why do shepherds never learn to count?
Because if they did, they would always be falling asleep.
What’s the difference between an orphan and a leaf? Only one falls down the family tree.
You know how bad of a person you are when you figure out how long you wait to smash. For me and my girlfriend, it was between the first plane crash and the last tower falling.
Why do scuba divers fall backwards off of the boat?
Because if they fell forward, they'd still be on the boat.
what do you get when you cross parents, the san fran bridge and a moody asian teen?
Niagra falls
I told a joke to a guy who had jumped off a bridge... He was in bits! 🤣🤦♂️
Even people who are good for nothing have the capacity to bring a smile to your face, like when you push them down the stairs.
What do you call a bunch of Paki's jumping off a cliff?
Chocolate drops.
Donald Trump secretly admires Joe Biden. How do I know?
He attempts to imitate "Sleepy Joe" by falling asleep during his court cases and during part of the Republican National Convention!
