Failure jokes
If Kobe missed a shot, his helicopter will too.
A Chelsea fan called Timo Werner on his phone to encourage him during his bad form. Timo Werner still missed all the calls.
What are the similarities between a broken tire and me?
We were both caused by broken rubber.
Why did the gym close down?
Because it just didn't work out.
What do you call a cow that doesn't produce any milk? An udder failure.
Just me...
The Stiggs life is a joke. Wait, I forgot, he doesn't have a life.
What's worse than a failed suicide, you ask?
I fail suicide because you forgot to do the dishes and your parents come after you and they're the ones to kill you, not yourself.
I wish I was dead like my jokes.
Flex tape can fix a sawed-in-half boat. Then how the f*** can it not fix the Titanic when it broke in half? Tell me!
The emo kid tried to give the tree a high five. Unfortunately, the tree left him hanging...
Wanna hear a joooooooke?
Your life.
If at first you don't succeed, cheat.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to get a bucket of water.
Jack slipped, his condom ripped, and now they have a daughter.
Kobe couldn’t clutch up with the rift to go.
Why can't Tottenham open a restaurant? Because they have no silverware.
This is a lot like anal sex.
You always miss 100% of the shots if you don't take it.
What's worse than funny condom fails?
Jake Paul.
A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter, so now I am dead!" Haha, it is funny because the squirrel gets dead.
My pencil sharpener broke, so now my pencil is pointless.
What's the definition of disappointment?
Running into a wall with a boner, but it only hits your nose.