FEMA during a natural disaster is kinda like me during sex. Slow to respond and not a lot of satisfying results.
Why are we still fighting in darkness?
"Mission failed, soldier, we will get 'em next time."
If at first you don't succeed, oh well, so much for skydiving.
What is a failed abortion? Annabelle
What do u call the woman that fucked sooooooo many hunks to have the condom break and a failure to be born? Ur Mum
What are the similarities between a broken tire and me?
We were both caused by broken rubber.
Someone forgot to do half the questions in the history test.
And that's what made him go down in history.
A Chelsea fan called Timo Werner on his phone to encourage him during his bad form. Timo Werner still missed all the calls.
I tried to organize a professional Hide-and-Seek tournament, but it was a complete failure. Good players are hard to find.
If Kobe missed a shot, his helicopter will too.
What do you call a cow that doesn't produce any milk? An udder failure.
What's worse than a failed suicide you ask? I fail suicide cuz you forgot to do the dishes and ur parents come after you and they're the ones to kill you not yourself
If at first you don't succeed, CHEAT.
If someone told me to bring up 9/11. They were trying to make a funny joke but it didnt work. That one really *crashed and burned*
Okay, Good night everyone who has common sense! "Akeld" you did not make it.
i was at a milk store and ordered some milk they brought it over but spilled it on me I said that was a udder failure
what do you call a failure in another language....... me
My broβs parents died but he didnβt know why.
Turns out they died because he was a failure and he would be going to an orphanage in 4 days
I've got not much of anything to be honest Been in special classes in school Not liked by people Only relationship I've ever had and she cheated on me 31 years old and never had sex pathetic Not very smart Don't look good Hate myself more than anything Been a failure at everything in life Probably be alone forever People treat me like crap Can't do anything right And the list goes on and on
So the question is why haven't I killed myself yet the answer is ,I forget I'm a extreme procrastinator keep just putting it off because I'll probably just fuck it up anyway
I think I found the worst joke in life ,For me it's that i have always been unwanted and alone for my hole life and I've have never even been In a relationship with anyone and I'm 31 years old and I also know that deep down, I'm always going to be alone and unhappy ,all I get out of life, is seeing everyone else with someone ,and knowing it will never happen for me , I think that's the worst joke I can think of .LIFE. Still living when you know you'll never find someone to be with I apologize with the wording to this it's another thing I am a failure at
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