Existence jokes
Wanna hear a joke?
My life.
What is the difference between me and food?
Food has a use.
Texter 1: You know People treat me like a god.
Texter 2: How?
Texter 1: They ignore my existence unless they need something.
Please don't make a joke about me; I'm just a human.
Your family is so messed up that they shared one brain cell to have you even exist.
What makes my life so unfair?
You invading it for no apparent reason.
The existence of the word "priest" implies the existence of "prier" and "pri".
"Do you have a noose?"
"Nose?"
"Yeah, noose- nose... I heard yours was stuffed lately--haha."
"I actually smell something--like a corpse. Is it you?"
"No."
*Dying on the inside has never been so detectable.*
It smells like something died in my room, oh yeah, it's my dignity, hope, and my feeling. Put in the corner of my room, they make a decent blanket to wipe my tears.
What's the difference between me and a corpse? I mean, I'm not dead... yet, right?
Your hairline is so nonexistent, even the universe couldn't find it.
Wanna see a mistake go on camera and take a pic of you?
Your hairline looks like Thanos snapped your hair out of existence.
There was a kid and a historian in a museum about WW2 and were looking at Hitler in a car doing the Nazi salute. The kid said, “Why is he putting his arm in the air?” The historian said, “Indicators on cars didn’t exist back then so he’s probably saying take the Third Reich!”
My parents created a joke 11 years ago and people are still laughing at it, but I know it's not me because jokes have meaning.
Life is never hard until you get hit hard with reality.
Rapunzel's hair is longer than your dad's existence.
I laughed at my life so hard.
What do you call someone with no nose and no body?
Nobody knows.
My friend: Hey, why are you always smiling?
Me: 'Cause life is a joke and we’re all slacking it off.