Existence jokes

Yo mama so fat that when she saw Thanos and he tried to snap her out of existence, it didn't work, and he said, "Man, I quit!"

I'm alive, baby!

Life's a bitch, and then you die. I now see what they mean.

What's the difference between a God and my mom?

My mom exists. I mean... she did at one point! Unlike any "Gods."

My parents created a joke 11 years ago and people are still laughing at it, but I know it's not me because jokes have meaning.

What's the difference between me and a corpse? I mean, I'm not dead... yet, right?

What do you call someone with no nose and no body?

Nobody knows.

Life is never hard until you get hit hard with reality.

"Do you have a noose?"

"Nose?"

"Yeah, noose- nose... I heard yours was stuffed lately--haha."

"I actually smell something--like a corpse. Is it you?"

"No."

*Dying on the inside has never been so detectable.*

My friend: Hey, why are you always smiling?

Me: 'Cause life is a joke and we’re all slacking it off.

There was a kid and a historian in a museum about WW2 and were looking at Hitler in a car doing the Nazi salute. The kid said, “Why is he putting his arm in the air?” The historian said, “Indicators on cars didn’t exist back then so he’s probably saying take the Third Reich!”

Not a joke?

More like not an existing organism in life.

I laughed at my life so hard.

Rapunzel's hair is longer than your dad's existence.

I would make a joke about America... However, the fact it exists is a joke in itself.

I have a new joke.

My life. Wait... jokes are supposed to have meaning.

Why is death taken so lightly?

Because anyone can take it.

What's the cruelest joke?

Life.

What do you (anyone) and a joke not have in common?

Jokes have meanings.

Dad: Alive.

Brother: Orphan (fault=Mother).

Me: Dead on the inside but sadly alive.

Mother: Alive...

Wait a minute... I thought you were dead, Mom... Right, you're dead to me at least.