Existence jokes
Life's full of ups and downs :D <3
A straight man and a gay man are talking. The straight man says, "I'm wanted in 2 states for murder." and the gay man replies with, "Oh, that sucks. I'm wanted in 13 for existing."
Wanna hear a joke?
My life.
A joke: my life, hahahahaha! Wait, it's not funny.
In 2013, it was reported that China has lost around 28,000 rivers; over half of what they thought existed. Some say climate change is the cause, others say it’s their harsh, economic expansion that’s unapologetic to the environment.
My theory is that those 28,000 rivers were sold to underground river-sex trafficking.
Some people ask why jokes exist. I say, when a mommy and daddy love each other very much, they have sex, and they make another one of you.
What's the similarity between a broken pencil and my life?
They're both pointless.
What's the difference between my imaginary friend and God?
None.
They're both imaginary.
Please don't make a joke about me; I'm just a human.
Q: Why didn’t Santa eat the milk and cookies you set out for him?
A: He doesn’t exist, you childish sh**!
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Die.
Die who?
Me, I want to die.
Your life. That's all.
I call my friends Dodo birds. Because they don't exist.
Did you know an eraser on a pencil slowly dies from your mistakes?
And did you know you're actually supposed to live for 25 minutes, but every time you breathe, it resets time?
Rape jokes are the funniest thing to ever exist.
You looking for jokes? I have one: your life.
How to not exist: Kys.
Slavery has existed in the western world for 3 centuries, but in the Arab regions it has existed before and is still going on, so why don’t people talk about it?
Because it’s only bad when white people do it.
Me and my life.
What do you call a girl with no arms and no legs?
Names.