Existence jokes

What did a bee who was interested in philosophy say?

"To bee or not to bee."

I was about to joke about your life, but I think your life is already a joke.

If the noose breaks, stab yourself!

If the knife is dull, shoot yourself!

If the gun's out of ammo, *YOU'RE HERE TO SUFFER ETERNALLY.*

Dark humor is like water. It exists.

I’m rather relaxed about death.

From quite an early age, I’ve regarded it as part of the deal, the unwritten guarantee that comes with your birth certificate.

Here's a joke: Your life decisions.

There are millions of people in the world, yet you are here.

Brits don't exist. Mummies can't have kids.

A: Who can tell me a joke?

B: Life.

Me before: Why do bandanas exist? They're ugly.

Me after seeing your hairline: Oh, I seeee.

Me giving pro tip: Get a bandana LMAO.

Hi, are you even my sister?

Yes, I am.

No, you're not, because you never even existed as my sister.

Sleep and death are alike; it's just with death you don't wake up.

Your life. That's all.

Want to hear a joke?

My life. Get it?

I'm life.

Me and my life.

Premise 1: IF God exists, he exists.

Premise 2: If God exists, he exists.

Premise 3: IF God exists, he definitely exists.

Conclusion: Therefore he exists.

You are about to hear the funniest joke ever.

My life.

NORTH INDIANS: Decent, but overrated af. They are the only thing that comes to many ppl's minds when someone says "Indian".

SOUTH INDIANS: Decent, but underrated af. Many ppl don't even know they exist. They are literally asked if they are North Indians.

WEST AND EAST: Decent but underrated af.

Wanna hear a joke?

My life.