Existence jokes

Brits don't exist. Mummies can't have kids.

Me before: Why do bandanas exist? They're ugly.

Me after seeing your hairline: Oh, I seeee.

Me giving pro tip: Get a bandana LMAO.

Hi, are you even my sister?

Yes, I am.

No, you're not, because you never even existed as my sister.

A: Who can tell me a joke?

B: Life.

I was about to joke about your life, but I think your life is already a joke.

I’m rather relaxed about death.

From quite an early age, I’ve regarded it as part of the deal, the unwritten guarantee that comes with your birth certificate.

Dark humor is like water. It exists.

If the noose breaks, stab yourself!

If the knife is dull, shoot yourself!

If the gun's out of ammo, *YOU'RE HERE TO SUFFER ETERNALLY.*

What did a bee who was interested in philosophy say?

"To bee or not to bee."

Here's a joke: Your life decisions.

Sleep and death are alike; it's just with death you don't wake up.

Your life. That's all.

I'm life.

Me and my life.

There are millions of people in the world, yet you are here.

NORTH INDIANS: Decent, but overrated af. They are the only thing that comes to many ppl's minds when someone says "Indian".

SOUTH INDIANS: Decent, but underrated af. Many ppl don't even know they exist. They are literally asked if they are North Indians.

WEST AND EAST: Decent but underrated af.

Wanna hear a joke?

My life.

Your life? Wanna hear a sadder one?

My life.

Your own life, hah!

Wanna see a mistake go on camera and take a pic of you?