Ever heard of the show naked and afraid? thats what i call hide and seek with my uncle.
Got into a fight last night. We both had blades. He cut me deep. I thought I was gone, but he forgot to keep the water running.
Weird thing was that we were in the fight of our lives in the restroom and that guy kinda look like me.
Thankfully I'm still alive because I fail at everything in life.
When the school shooter misses you but you gotta play it off;
😐😑
A war isn’t about who is right, it’s about who is left!
When the school shooter finds you and you think you’re gonna die but he remembers the time you gave him a pen. 🖌
Why was 6 afraid to go camping with 7?
Because 7 ONEted TWO bring THREE knives FOUR surFIVEal, but 6 secretly knew that 7 hEIGHTed him, and didn’t have beNINE inTENtions.
Read this out loud to yourself and it’ll make sense. ;)
Life is a try not to kill yourself challenge.
What game do zombies 🧟♀️ like to play?
Corpse and Robbers
You look like the 0.01 percent of bacteria the lysol didn't kill.
A person says why? and you say no
what is Africa's most famous sport?
the hunger games.
I was laughing my ass off when the 12 year old child realized the door to my basement was unlocked, and he didn't need to cannibalize his two friends in a desperate attempt for survival 🤣🤣🤣
when the south tower saw the north tower collapse he say I'm still standing.
Why am I still alive? Pills give me stomache, blood makes faint, height frightens me...
What do you call a Mexican in the zombie apocalypse?
Answer: "sweet and spicy chicken."
When a asteroid is coming to kill us all: 98.9% of the population: OMG WERE ALL GONNA DIE 1% of the population: eh.. I neber had any friends anyway. Alia: ROLL THE INTRO
I was walking in the forrest with my gf I had a desert eagle for protection A bear jumped out of the bushes one shot was enough to put my gf down and it gave me enough time to run away
what does a make a wish kid and mosquitoes have in common? They Both Got A 10% Survival Rate...
People shouldn’t be afraid during a zombie apocalypse. They can stay in their living room.
