Wife

pumpwrapper

A couple were trying new things in the bedroom to spice up their marriage. The husband would blindfold the wife, put on a condom and she would guess the flavor. they did this one time a night. The first night, she put the blindfold on and he put the condom on his dick and she tasted it, she immediately knew it was strawberry. The second night, the same thing happened except it was banana. The third night, she put the blindfold on and tasted his dick and said eww it tastes like cheese and onions. The husband replied hang on I haven’t put the condom on yet.

Shooting

Ano

When you decide to turn your high school into your personal shooting range but you don’t give any proper notice except for a bullet to the head…

Cry

Jokes

When I was young I got bullied by two kids, and whenever I got hit to the ground, I would get back up and cry. Then I had the courage to fight back. Except they didn’t get back up.

Uranus

Joker guy.

Teacher: what’s the closest planet. Kids yell: sun. Except for one. Other kid: Uranus. Teacher: Uranus? Other kid: Yeah, it’s right there.

Puns

Gary S

Which legendary Dutch wanderer slept for twenty years, except when he got up to pee?

Rip Van Tinkle

Music

PapaPony

Stephen Hawking tried joining some music bands but all of them rejected him… except Daft Punk.

Baby

watersharky

Im going to do a song thats called Falling by Trevor Daniel… so here it goes

My last made me feel like I would never try again But when I saw you, I felt something I never felt Come closer, I’ll give you all my love If you treat me right, baby, I’ll give you everything My last made me feel like I would never try again But when I saw you, I felt something I never felt Come closer, I’ll give you all my love If you treat me right, baby, I’ll give you everything Talk to me, I need to hear you need me like I need ya Fall for me, I wanna know you feel how I feel for you, love Before you, baby, I was numb, drowned out pain by pouring up Speeding fast on the run, never want to get caught up Now you the one that I’m calling Swore that I’d never fall again, don’t think I’m just talking I think I might go all in, no exceptions, girl, I need ya Think I’m out of my mind, 'cause I can’t get enough Only one that I give my time, 'cause I got eyes for ya Might make an exception for ya, 'cause I been feeling ya Think I might be out of my mind, I think that you’re the one My last made me feel like I would never try again But when I saw you, I felt something I never felt Come closer, I’ll give you all my love If you treat me right, baby, I’ll give you everything My last made me feel like I would never try again But when I saw you, I felt something I never felt Come closer, I’ll give you all my love If you treat me right, baby, I’ll give you everything I’ll never give my all again 'Cause I’m sick of falling down When I open up and give my trust They find a way to break it down Tear me up inside, and you break me down

Paul Walker

Trix

Every hair zodiac has a hairstyle- except cancer

Halloween

ITS! COCO

I asked my mom is I could be Wednesday ( from the Addams family) She said no she said I would look creepy and weird she said I HAVE TO BE SOMETHING CUTE, the outfit looked ridicules, Everyone else looked spooky except for me ;-;

Dad

Anonymous

Dad:where is my son Son:come join me me with musical chairs except we stand on them Dad:ok so do we put this round our neck Son:YES MUM:AHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Funeral

Not A Undercover Cop

“I’m sorry” and “my bad” mean the same thing. Except at a funeral.

Gwen

Addison Banks age (8)

Pretend me please stop! I don’t recall posting anything except commenting and posting something for Jordan C! Please stop!

Baby

watersharky

Ok Air Attack Productions… Beat This-Falling-By watersharky Productions and TD- My last made me feel like I would never try again But when I saw you, I felt something I never felt Come closer, I’ll give you all my love If you treat me right, baby, I’ll give you everything My last made me feel like I would never try again But when I saw you, I felt something I never felt Come closer, I’ll give you all my love If you treat me right, baby, I’ll give you everything Talk to me, I need to hear you need me like I need ya Fall for me, I wanna know you feel how I feel for you, love Before you, baby, I was numb, drowned out pain by pouring up Speeding fast on the run, never want to get caught up Now you the one that I’m calling Swore that I’d never fall again, don’t think I’m just talking I think I might go all in, no exceptions, girl, I need ya Think I’m out of my mind, 'cause I can’t get enough Only one that I give my time, 'cause I got eyes for ya Might make an exception for ya, 'cause I been feeling ya Think I might be out of my mind, I think that you’re the one My last made me feel like I would never try again But when I saw you, I felt something I never felt Come closer, I’ll give you all my love If you treat me right, baby, I’ll give you everything My last made me feel like I would never try again But when I saw you, I felt something I never felt Come closer, I’ll give you all my love If you treat me right, baby, I’ll give you everything I’ll never give my all again 'Cause I’m sick of falling down When I open up and give my trust They find a way to break it down Tear me up inside, and you break me down

Trump

Anonymoose

As the coronavirus pandemic strengthens… Trump - "Quick, inject yourselves with bleach" Also Trump - “I order everyone in America to wear a face mask except for me”

1

Priest

Zuchuri

When a Muslim dies he gets 72 virgins. It’s the same thing with priests except the virgins are children.

Priest

Subject Frans Comedy

these are all of my terrible jokes

Two antennas met on a roof, they fell in love and got married. The ceremony was alright but the reception was amazing A jumper cable walks into a bar and the bartender said "I’ll serve you but don’t start anything A dyslexic man walks into a bra Two cannibals are eating a clown, one says "does this taste funny to you, I’m joking of course" Dejamoo: the feeling that you’ve heard this bull before A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident and said to the doctor “I can’t feel my legs” the doctor said " I know, I AMPUTATED YOUR ARMS" I went to seafood disco last week, I pulled a muscle What do you call a fish with no eyes, a fsh Two fish swim into a concrete wall, one says "dam" A mystic dwarf escapes from a jail, the call went out of a "small medium at large" A man walks into a bar with solid tar under his arm, he says "a beer please,and one for the road" Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? The p is silent YO MAMA SO FAT THAT she should be worried, diabetes is a serious problem What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut, duh A priest a rabbi and a cleric walk into a bar, the cleric, due to his religious constructions, does not drink alcohol. The others do the same, they have a pleasant fun and nothing bad happens. What’s red and smells like blue paint? Red paint. I remember the last words my grandad said before he kicked the bucket, how far do you think I can kick this bucket A man walks into a bar, his alcohol independence is pulling this family apart I like my coffee like my women, on sometimes with a penis A man is working at a bar, a money comes in and orders a banana martini. The man wakes up and tells his story to his wife, he is ignored and he turns around sobbing. His marriage is falling apart Why didn’t Jesus play hockey? Soccer and baseball are more popular in Mexico What’s green and has wheels? Grass, the wheels WERE A LIE. What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have wheels except the duck Why couldn’t the dinosaur break the wall, I don’t know. I’m asking you Why did the old woman put rainbow roller skates on her walker, she has dementia There are an owl and a squirrel watching a farmer go by, they owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing. It’s an owl it can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because the owl is a bird of prey

Orphan

ALYA

HI everyone that is mean to freshfry,Addison banks, drew,watersharky,Gwen,and jk master fucking get off this site bully’s I love everyone here except the bullies!

Dad

Anonymous

daughter:dad why did mom do best? dad:nothing except pretend to love us and leave
daughter:so she only loves my sister? dad:yep

Cannibal

Cannibal Chickens.

I fed some Chickens some eggs. They ate them. Nothing else to explain except they are cannibals.