Event jokes
What's the square root of 2001?
9/11
Why was the baby Dinosaur an orphan?
His family was blown up by meteors.
Why was the tower of Pisa leaning?
They had better reflexes than the trading center.
Sandy Hook is my favorite holiday.
What did the Titanic say as it sank?
I’m nominating all passengers for the Ice Bucket Challenge!
I screamed "Jenga" today when watching the 9/11 documentary.
I give these jokes a 9/11.
What do the Twin Towers and school have in common?
People jumped off a building to escape it.
I had a cake for my gender reveal party. I cut it, and the inside was yellow...
Orphans' calendar consists of 362 days. Why?
Because they don't got homecoming, Father's Day, and Mother's Day.
Q: Who are the fastest readers in the world?
A: The 9/11 victims. They went through 20 stories in seconds.
It took me 9.11 seconds to realize.
There are a lot of things that explode... like cars, boats, the Twin Towers.
Your mama so stupid, she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.
What’s a fun game to play during a pride parade?
Capture the flag.
I'm just gonna say it, and don't get offended, but I'm so sick of the media being on the female side. It never shows what life is like for a male.
Yes, women do have it hard in life because they have to give birth, etc.
But men have it pretty hard too, if not harder. Males are criticized for showing emotions.
Men have to go to war on the front lines.
Boys have less support from their friends because showing any emotion is a sign of weakness.
Boys have to wear trousers in schools where they practically burn to death in summer, meanwhile girls get to wear dresses and skirts. And now we hear girls complaining about them not being allowed to wear trousers. Yet we haven't ever heard anything about boys protesting about wearing shorts to school. It's because no one will take a man's protest seriously because the media is always against the men.
Man-rape is unheard of in the media, and I've never seen anything in any form of news accusing a woman as a rapist.
We are expected to gather up our guts [and] ask a girl to be their girlfriend. We have to take them on dates, pay the bill, [and] buy them gifts when the girls never do anything like that for us males. We have to get a job while they put on makeup and go out with their friends and spend 3 months' worth of the money the man has made.
And the women say we only rape women and that we restrict women from doing certain things like fighting in world wars.
It's because most males do not want females to get hurt, yet we are criticized for this.
I propose an idea that on the 19th of September every year (until we get the point across) all males do not go to work, etc.
Who's going to put out all the fires? The two "firewomen" at the local fire station? Who is going to work in the major corporations? The secretary's and the receptionist?
Women are always saying that the world will be a better place if they're are no men around. Let's show them how wrong they are.
(This event can be done worldwide.)
Share this with as many people who still believe in the rights of the males.
(I'm not against feminism; it's just that everything in the media is about some stupid problem women are complaining about + hatred for males everywhere.
But I think that nowadays women have more rights than men because they can wear what they want, do what they want, and never get criticized or face any consequences.)
What makes 9/11 an inside job?
Someone started calling it 10/7.
What was going through the heads of the 9/11 victims on the 42nd floor?
The 43rd floor.
Wanna know why not to joke about 9/11? They usually crash the party.
What time is it when you get home? Can you walk, walk home? Was your night night? You had fun? I had dinner, night time, and a tree. I had dinner. Is it a magic time? Dinner! I have been home. Was good.