Entertainment jokes
The bears came home. Daddy bear said, "Who's been eating my porridge?" said, "Who's been in my porch?" Baby bear said, "Never mind about the porridge, who knocked the telly?"
My grandpa warned people the Titanic would sink, but they wouldn’t listen, so he kept warning them. Then he was kicked out of the theater.
Okay, long story fast, I walked to GameStop in my house, in the kitchen, by Walmart, to a BTS Squid Game concert, and Drake and Pablo were there for her labor in the Cowboys stadium by Nike, so I bought a pencil from a dead alive man. He said "ZOO WEE MAMA." So yeah.
First (DYM 68).
Why did people invent glow in the dark condoms?
So gay people can have lightsaber duels.
What’s an emo's favorite singer?
Slash.
A man goes to the doctor. Says he's depressed. Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone in a threatening world.
Doctor says: "Treatment is simple. The great clown - Pagliacci - is in town. Go see him. That should pick you up."
Man bursts into tears, says "But doctor... I am Pagliacci."
I have a really good joke.
Do you want to hear it?
Oh wait, this is a bad joke website.
Papyrus: Sans, your jokes are bad!
Sans: I don’t care; I got thick skin.
A failed marriage is like an Avengers movie.
First someone snaps, then half your stuff is gone.
You're so ugly that when The Oh Hellos saw you, they were like "Oh Bye!"
What is an orphan's favorite movie?
"Home Alone."
Why don't rappers tell secrets?
Because they always spill the beats.
What's an orphan's least favorite T.V. show?
Family Guy.
"We got a number one victory royale, yeah Fortnite we boutta get down! Get down! Ten kills on the board right now, just wiped out tomato town! My friend's gone down, I revived him now we're heading southbound! Now we're in the pleasant park street, look at the map, go to the marked sheet!"
A sister told her brother to walk to the store, buy some candy, and watch a movie with her while eating the candy.
But he couldn't walk because he has no legs. He couldn't buy candy because he has no arms. He couldn't watch a movie because he was blind, and he couldn't eat because he has no stomach. Who said he was real?
Why didn't the newest Star Wars movie start with the classic scrawl?
Because it was a Rogue One!
Spongebob: Easy now, you try first. Get a jar.
Patrick: *picks up nuke*
Spongebob: Patrick, that's a nuke!
Patrick: Yes.
Nuke: *boom*
Q: Why do orphans hate Fast and Furious movies?
A: Because they say "family" too often.
What is it called when Bill Cosby and an illegal immigrant fight?
Aliens vs. Predator