Employment jokes

I lost my job at the bank today. A lady told me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.

Yo mama's so ugly, she went into a haunted house......

And came back out with a job application, then that ran away *CAUSE SHE'S A UGLY FUCK*

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To get to his job at KFC!

So, this woman had a job. She wanted to hang out with her boyfriend, so she lied about having the coronavirus. Then she got out of work. Then she was texting her boss when she thought she was texting her boyfriend. Then she said, "I lied. Now we can...you know...water...sigh...lick...sigh." Then her boss texted, "Ew and YOU'RE FIRED."

One more story: One day this teen named Alexis got kicked out of a house, then went to live with her boyfriend. Then she got pregnant and posted it all on social media.

9 people walked into Bunnings Warehouse.

2 people bought plants.

3 people bought shovels.

1 person yelled.

3 people left Bunnings Warehouse.

1 person was me. I guess those three people are fired! 💁‍♀️🤦‍♀️

"Today was the worst day ever." "Why?" Because my ex got hit by a bus, and I lost my job as a bus driver.

Hi, I got fired. Oh, don't know which fire? Oh, the one that I got burned on, the volcano.

I used to work at a bank, then I lost interest.

I made a bunch of jokes about unemployed people. Sadly, all of them don't work.

Orphans can’t work at Johnson and Johnson because it’s a family company.

Job sucks. XD

Why did the person get fired from the calendar factory?

Because they took a day off.

Why is it that a physically disabled gay white male will refuse to ask his boss that is an abled bodied gay white male for an increase in his paycheck?

Since he has a very big white dick in his mouth, that could be the reason why.

Finally my father came early from office today. I am very happy.

He was fired from his job.

My dad has a pretty shitty job.

Some people don't appreciate what I do for a living.

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I worked at a calendar factory, but I got the sack for taking a few days off!

Hi, my name is Meer Adnan Hussain. I am a Muslim. I live in Karachi, an area of Pakistan. I want this job. I am interested in this work. Please take me in this work. Your porn star, Meer Adnan Hussain. Wait for your email. Okay.

You are so ugly, when you went to a haunted house, you came back with a job application.

Did you hear about the blind prostitute?

Well, you got to hand it to her.