Education jokes
Me: Spanish teacher, why do we need to learn Spanish?
Teacher: Because you might go to Mexico and start a job.
Me: Why would I want to sell drugs?
I fucking hate school, god damn!
My cousin’s friend spelled “racist” wrong and when my cousin showed me, the first thing I said to my cousin’s friend is “Go to Grammarly. They REALLY teach you spelling.”
Teacher: What do you want when you grow up?
That depressed kid in class: Dead.
I'm in school shooting. #USA
Memes
Why did the sun not go to college? Because it already has a million degrees!
Why don't orphans go on trips at school?
Parent signature: _______________
Why can't an orphan go to college?
He needs a parent signature.
Kid: Mom, do trees poop?
Mom: Yes. That is how we get #2 pencils.
A teacher says, "What comes before 47?" Quiet kid: "AK!"
What is the difference between a tree and "walk walk home from school and walk walk home and walk walk home from school and walk home"?
Was your birthday?
What is yellow and brings kids to school every day?
Why was Stephen Hawking a bad influence towards kids? Because he couldn’t stand for anything.
What do inner city schools and databases have in common?
Their problems are usually caused by a race condition.
In our history class we were on our China unit and learning a little about gunpowder.
And I said "WOAH THAT'S LIT!"
2+2=7
I was in Alabama last year. I walked into a store and noticed a couple kissing each other, and I said, "Excuse me, where is the bathroom?" and the man said, "Right over there." I went into the bathroom and then heard the girl say, "Dad, I have to go to school soon!"
Good day today, love you. Walk in love day and a walk home night. Night, night. I did not get snow. I love it is the day that we get a tree. I have to go get some sleep. Was good day at school today, but I’m going to be...
Hey, math:
I’m really tired of trying to find your X. Accept that she’s gone, and solve your own problems, dude!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Lettuce.
Lettuce who?
Lettuce out of school early!