Education jokes
What's yellow and can't swim but screams when it goes under?
A school bus full of kids.
Why can't you teach an orphan new tricks?
Because there is no one to teach them.
I have to say my humor isn't the best, but I'll give this a go.
My science teacher always reminded us about kilometers per second. Now I want to kilometer per second.
You know those credit card inserters at Walgreens? I want to insert my credit card on my wrist.
I'll shut up now.
When the autistic kid brings a gun to school and thinks it’s a dart gun.
In the morning at 6:30 AM,
Teacher: Who fought in World War I?
Me: Trump & Biden.
Teacher: Oh ok... well good job class, see you tomorrow and study your books.
After school,
Teacher: Oh God those kids know nothing.
"She looks at her clock."
Teacher: And now I am sewed.
Memes
Once, there was a kid named Cale, but his classmates didn’t know it was spelled with a “C,” so they asked him if he could be their snack.
The teacher says to do your homework. I do. My friends do. One person never does any of his homework.
Eventually, we had to have fun. He said he didn't do it. WOW what did he do? I like to think he got smacked and nearly committed suicide.
Today we need to teach our teens about having safe sex while using contraceptives.
Condoms 99 percent effective.
Birth control 99 percent effective.
Etc.
Just be like me and use underage 7 year olds works 100 percent of the time (only cost 20 years in jail ;)
A kid walks into the classroom on time.
Study tip: Laminate your notes so they don't get damaged by the tears!
Me: Spanish teacher, why do we need to learn Spanish?
Teacher: Because you might go to Mexico and start a job.
Me: Why would I want to sell drugs?
Why did the cheetah go to school?
To be a cheetah.
We have a teacher in school. His name is Haybrock, but he is gay, so we call him Gaybrock.
Teacher: What is your least favorite holiday?
Orphan: National Forgive Your Mom And Dad Day.
Teacher: Why is that your least favorite?
Orphan: Because I don't have any parents to forgive.
Teacher: *tries to hold back* HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
I fucking hate school, god damn!
Little Johnny was learning about anal sex, when he learned what it was he said, "My uncle just calls this shhhhh..."
Teacher: Your bag is heavy, what's in there?
The quiet kid: AK-47.
Why do orphans hate Geometry?
Because it reminds them that their parents are poley-gone.
I know this is a very corny joke.
Why can’t orphans go on school trips?
Parent's signature: _________
Teacher: What do you want when you grow up?
That depressed kid in class: Dead.