Today we need to teach our teens about having safe sex while using contraceptives.
Condoms 99 percent effective.
Birth control 99 percent effective.
Etc.
Just be like me and use underage 7 year olds works 100 percent of the time (only cost 20 years in jail ;)
A kid walks into the classroom on time.
Study tip: Laminate your notes so they don't get damaged by the tears!
Me: Spanish teacher, why do we need to learn Spanish?
Teacher: Because you might go to Mexico and start a job.
Me: Why would I want to sell drugs?
Why did the cheetah go to school?
To be a cheetah.
We have a teacher in school. His name is Haybrock, but he is gay, so we call him Gaybrock.
Teacher: What is your least favorite holiday?
Orphan: National Forgive Your Mom And Dad Day.
Teacher: Why is that your least favorite?
Orphan: Because I don't have any parents to forgive.
Teacher: *tries to hold back* HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
I fucking hate school, god damn!
Little Johnny was learning about anal sex, when he learned what it was he said, "My uncle just calls this shhhhh..."
Teacher: Your bag is heavy, what's in there?
The quiet kid: AK-47.
Why do orphans hate Geometry?
Because it reminds them that their parents are poley-gone.
I know this is a very corny joke.
Why can’t orphans go on school trips?
Parent's signature: _________
Teacher: What do you want when you grow up?
That depressed kid in class: Dead.
Why did the sun not go to college? Because it already has a million degrees!
I'm in school shooting. #USA
Kid: Mom, do trees poop?
Mom: Yes. That is how we get #2 pencils.
Why don't orphans go on trips at school?
Parent signature: _______________
Why can't an orphan go to college?
He needs a parent signature.
A teacher says, "What comes before 47?" Quiet kid: "AK!"
Why was Stephen Hawking a bad influence towards kids? Because he couldn’t stand for anything.
