Never invest in funerals. It's a dying industry.
Donald Trump is making hospitals so poor that they are using kidney beans for their transplants.
"Florida was ranked the worst state in the 50 states by Thriller."
Florida: Well, WE didn't want to give our oranges anyway!
A man went to a Ford dealership hoping to find a car, but he said they weren't affordable.
How did you get that? Used your life savings?
What is the capital of Greece? -- About 10 dollars.
Yo mama is so poor, she buys used food.
Yo mama is so nasty, she buys sex toys at the second-hand shop.
How does a prostitute make more than a drug dealer?
Because she can clean her crack and sell it again.
Why did the one-handed man cross the road?
To get to the second-hand store!
Why is there no gambling in Africa?
Too many Cheetahs.
