Ok, I put one penny down. Do you smell anything?
1 scent.
I put two pennies down. Do you see any fruit?
2 pears.
I put three pennies down. Do you see any law enforcement?
3 coppers.
I put four pennies down. Do you see any cars?
4 Lincolns.
I put five pennies down. Do you see any pussies?
NOT FOR 5 CENTS YOU DONT!
What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer?
A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.
Yo mama is so poor, she makes her own hand sanitizer.
Why doesn't Africa have pharmacies?
Because you can't take drugs on an empty stomach.
What did the bank say to the person?
Bank you very much.
I'm lonely, but all I have is my cheeseburger, but what is the matter of living if you only have one thing?
But a cheeseburger is all you need 'cause it has 1,000,000,000,000 bucks man, so I can't just take it and spend it wherever I want.
Information has been leaked from government sources. When the current lock-up ends, the holder of the nation's purse, Fishi Rucksack, will launch a new initiative.
This will be to help the struggling "personal services" industry and will be labelled, "Sleep out to Help out."
What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer?
A hooker can wash her crack, then sell it again.
Yo daddy so poor, when yo mama ask for sum child support money, yo dad don’t have it! 🤣
In 2013, it was reported that China has lost around 28,000 rivers; over half of what they thought existed. Some say climate change is the cause, others say it’s their harsh, economic expansion that’s unapologetic to the environment.
My theory is that those 28,000 rivers were sold to underground river-sex trafficking.
Times have been so tough lately, I have had to jerk off the dog just to feed the cat.
You're so poor not even Dollar Tree has your prices.
Did you hear about the goldfish that went bankrupt?
Now he's a bronze fish.
What did the sign on an out-of-business brothel say?
"Beat it. We're closed."
What did the piggy bank say to his piggy friend?
"Ain't you got no cents?"
Piggy: "Actually, no. Just pork."
Me: The man sleeped in a $200 bed in His hole life so why dose he need a $2,000 coffin?
My friend: They're cheaper at Costco.
Me: Oh shit, you're going to have "fun" this weekend.
What do me and a casino machine have in common? It takes about 50 pumps to get to the jackpot.
If you give a prostitute money, you will go to jail, but if you give a prostitute a Klondike bar, you will not go to jail. I would rather go to the casino and get more money for my buck.
China wants their name on everything but the m.f. virus.
"Give me 5 cents and I’ll grant you a wish."
Ok.
"Thank you, what is your wish?"
I wish for my 5 cents back.
