Dont jokes

Why aren't orphans good at Monopoly?

They don't know what a house is.

Why don't Asian kids believe in Santa Claus?

Because they're the ones who made the toys.

Using modern day technology you can produce music with a Tesla coil. I don't know if you heard it, but it is quite shocking and even electrifying. I can't tell if it is metal or techno, but it is more valuable than joules. It really amps up your blood pressure and has you saying watt the whole time. It is way better than current music.

Don't you just hate it when your grandmas always complaining about things getting stuck between her false teeth, like my foreskin?

My name is Ethan, and I don't find this funny.

Orphans don't like family sized chips, I wonder why.

Me: "What's the difference between an apple and an emo?"

Friend: "I don't know."

Me: An apple actually falls from the tree.

What do you call an autistic person? Names.

I'm autistic myself, so don't go crying in my comment section.

I don't want to die alone... That is why I am working my way up to become a suicide bomber!

dont make jokes about the accident my dad died in it he was the best pilot in all of Saudi Arabia :(

Friend: Wanna hear a joke?

Other Friend: Sure.

Friend: Pussy.

Other Friend: I don't get it.

Friend: And you never will.

Don't be sad, because that's das backwards and das not good.

Why don't parents get school shooting jokes? They're aimed at a younger audience.

Kobe Bryant and 9/11 are two things I don't joke about because when I do, they tend to crash and burn.

Ahem... if somebody you don't like, or somebody random just calls you in general,

answer the phone with this:

"Hello, thank you for choosing Mama's Pizzeria/Abortion Clinic, your loss is our sauce, how may I help you?"

or

"Hello, this is David's Orphanage, you make them, we take them, how may I help you?"

Some people's reactions are priceless, and then they wonder about your mental health.

Why can't two Asians make a white baby?

Because two wongs don't make a white.

I would make a dad joke, but I don't have a dad to joke about.

What's life if you don't have one...

Why don't Chinese people believe in Santa? Cause they make the toys.

Sister: I don't want to do it, but...

Me: No more butts! Butts are too yuck to be in this sentence.