Doesnt jokes
My sis was funny but sad because I have a boy and she doesn't.
If you are having sex and your feet are out of the tent, it doesn't count.
"Actions speak louder than words."
This doesn't apply to Stephen Hawking, however...
Why doesn't a teddy bear eat? Because it is already stuffed.
What is the difference between an emo kid and a jug of milk?
The milk doesn't hang itself after it gets dumped.
Anonymous: This guy reads everyone's jokes, but why doesn't he answer his mom?
Hey guys, I have a question.
Doesn't everyone's parents tell them don't take candy from strangers? Then what is Halloween?
Your mama is so ugly, she doesn't have to flush the toilet. She already scared the shit out of it.
Why is the fat man roping himself to the side of a mountain?
So he doesn't roll back down!
Marriage is like buying a car. You see one that you like and then you buy it. But over the years, it gets older, rusty, and certain parts stop working.
Then you walk into a dealership and look at all the new ones and you're still stuck with the old one. You look over and go, "But I just wanna sit in it. Just once. It's even got leather interior, it's chrome, it doesn't even have oil or gas leaks! And it doesn't squeak!"
Yo, Dad is so skinny, he doesn't work out enough.
Chuck Norris doesn't need protein bars. He just eats his own shit.
One day, Johnny told his dad that a girl in his class liked him. He thought she was cute. She said, "Aw, you're like candy!" He didn't say anything. He said, "Why don't you think I am sweet like candy?" Little Johnny said, "Well, sometimes I get a toothache, and it hurts, so I stop eating it, like I stopped liking you."
Why does the orphan hate family jokes?
Cus it doesn't have one.
If my cat was a cactus, doesn't that make him a catus?
Guess McAfee doesn’t clear all computer viruses.
Where’s the English Channel?
Johnny: “I don’t know. My television doesn’t pick it up.”
Your hairline is so long that sometimes even the president doesn't know where it ends.
Why do orphans have an iPhone 10?
Because it doesn't have a joke button.
POV: An Asian kidnapper kidnapped an Asian kid, and the kidnapper called the kid's mom. Then the mom said, "No, it's fine, my kid got a B, he failed." And the kidnapper let him go saying he doesn't need a failure.