DOE jokes
What noise does Sally like to say? Splat!
So my dad tells these jokes and someone posted one on this website so...
How many Polish people does it take to change a light bulb? 101, one to hold the light bulb and 100 to spin the house.
There’s also one about a bowling ball in a bath tub he hasn’t told me that though. I'll research that.
What does a mother fear most?
Hearing "YOU ARE NOT THE FATHER!" for 5 different men.
First Man: My dog's got no nose.
Second Man: How does he smell?
First Man: Awful.
The doe comes out of the woods, shakes herself, and says,
"I can't believe I did that for 2 bucks!"
Bro: I’m not crazy. What he does during facetime:
If a gay person is vegan, how does he have sex? He will keep getting meat stuck in his ass and in his throat.
What does a French woman say when you ask her what her favorite video game is? "Oui, oui!"
Why does rapboat like underage girls? Cos grown ass girls are too clever for him.
What does a bird say when it gets sick?
I flu!
Why does the kid in the wheelchair get bullied all the time?
Because he can’t stand up for himself.
How does Skeletor feel after He-Man beats him up?
Skelesore.
Q: What does encyclopedia mean by cut them in triple?
A: Encyclopedia, more like "An Cyclone Media!"
Where does the Batman go to pee?
The Batroom.
Why does Hitler hate golf?
He would end up in a bunker!
A man goes to a doctor and says he's having problems shitting, so the doctor gives him an enema and says he needs to do it a few times at home, but does the first one for him. So the guy bends over the table, lubes him up, and shoves it deep in him, and he yells.
So later, the man goes home and tells his wife he needs her help with the enema. So he bends over, she lubes him up, puts a hand on his shoulder, and she shoves it up there, and he starts screaming and cussing, and the wife asks, "Did I hurt you?" He said, "No, I just realized when the doctor did it, he had both hands on my shoulders."
Why does Hitler need glasses?
Because he could Nazi.
What does a Foreigner say when he comes to America?
"You're as cold as I.C.E. You're willing to sacrifice brown lives..."
What does the Cow say to the spy?
"Are you udder cover?"
What does the cannibal say when he jumps into the pool?
CANNONBALL! P.S. I made this myself.
Why does New York have the Jets as their football team if those are what took out the Twin Towers?