DOE jokes
What store does an orphan hate?
Family Tree.
What was Michael Jackson's answer to the parents of the little boys who were left with him when asked why does he do it that way? Tell them that it's human nature.
What game does a suicidal person who is very bad at word or guessing games love?
Hangman.
How long does it take for a depressed person to change a light bulb?
5 days. & I’m pretty proud of myself.
Other girls want a guy who is 6ft, but does me being 6ft under count?
How many white guys does it take to screw a lightbulb?
None. They hire me to do it.
How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just sit in the dark and bitch.
Why does an orphanage stay overnight at a school? Cause their parents won't pick them up.
How many women does it take to change a lightbulb? All of them if you keep reloading.
Why does Santa have such a big sack? He only comes once a year.
What does a freshly pregnant teen and her baby share?
They both think, "Mom's probably going to kill me."
Why does the Queen have more mobility than the King in chess?
Because it's shaped like the kitchen floor.
What does an orphan call a kidnapping?
A surprise adoption.
How does an Alabama mother know when her daughter is on her period? She can taste the blood on her son’s dick.
You know that if it says, "Adopt a Highway" and no one does, we're driving on orphans.
What do a mag and a clip have in common? They are both good at school.
How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?
One to change the bulb and one to suck my dick.
What does my arm have in common with paper?
They both can be cut.
I have a question: Does aging affect corpses, too?
Just asking to know if I still count as a pedophile or not!
If a school shooter walks into a classroom and shoots an autistic kid, what does the kid say? "Why do I look like Swiss cheese?"