DOE jokes
What does a bouncy airplane sound like?
Boeing Boeing Boeing...
Comedian: If you’re racist and you know it, clap your hands.
Guy 1 & Guy 2: 👏👏
Comedian: WTF bros!
Comedian: And one of you is black and one is white. How does that work?
When does a cub become a Boy Scout?
When he eats his first brownie.
How tall does the grass grow in Germany?
Zis high!
What’s Whitney Houston’s favorite type of coordination? HAAAAND EEEEEEEEEYYYYEEE!
What’s better than Ted Danson? Ted singing and Danson!
What did the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna one, Anna two!
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!
What does a nosey pepper do? It gets jalapeño business!
Sy'kyira (😌): I can't wait for the therapist to come.
Daina (😊): Same, 30 minutes have passed... I also wonder what that loud sound is.
Sy'kyira (😅): SAME!!!! What, does it sound like a woman suffering???
Daina (😌): I know, right?
What does a British cannibal's favorite meal?
Fish and chaps.
How does water say hi?
It waves.
How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Are you kidding? Feminists can’t change anything.
Why does Michael Jackson like Doge Miner? He thinks it's about minors dressed in doge costumes.
If an orphan wants food, who does it? No one. Everybody just watches him starve because they couldn't find his parents.
What kind of bath bomb does an emo person use?
A toaster.
What's the difference between Jane Doe and a field?
A field gets harvested in the fall, while Jane Doe gets plowed.
How many babies does it take to paint the side of a barn?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
Why does a milking stool have 3 legs?
Because the cow has the udder one.
What does it say on Stephen Hawking's grave?
"Rust in peace."
How does a train eat?
It goes, "chew chew."
What sound does a baby make when you put it in a blender? I don’t know. I was too busy wanking.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
I don't know, it depends on how hard you throw them.
When does a pentagon only have 4 sides?
When a plane hits it.