DOE jokes
How many babies does it take to paint a wall red?
It depends on how hard you throw them. 😈😈
What does a paedophile say when he gets to heaven?
A: Where's the holy baby?
Why does every emo kid try to be like Tarzan? So they can swing on the vine.
What does a woman’s pussy and a chainsaw have in common?
Miss by a few inches and you’re in deep shit.
What do a turtle and a pedophile have in common?
They both try to get there before the hair does.
What does the Fox say?
Fraka - kaka - kaka - kow.
Roses are red, violets are blue, feminist pussy stinks, and yours does too.
Where does a black Eskimo live?
In a Nigglu.
What does an eighty-year-old woman have in between her boobs that a twenty-year-old woman doesn't?
A belly button.
How does a depressed couple say goodbye on the phone?
"No, you hang yourself first..."
Why did Michael Jackson die?
Because I have a new phone number, and he does not know.
My nan broke her toe on a brick today. Last time she broke her toe because she kicked her car tire. Does that now mean I have to tow her back to the doctors?
How many redheads does it take to change a lightbulb?
One! She holds the bulb and the world revolves around her.
How many babies does it take to paint wheels red?
It depends on your speed.
A man drinks beer and jumps off a tower, and he's okay. The other guy says, "Whoa, how'd you do that?"
He does it again, so the guy gets a beer, the same beer, and jumps off. He died.
The bartender looks at the original man who jumped off and says, "Superman, you're a real butthole whenever you're drunk."
A Lew runs into a wall, what does he break? His Nose.
A Mexican runs into a wall, what does he break? His lawn mower.
What does NASA stand for?
Need Another Seven Astronauts!
How does a train dance?
It bogies!
What does this website with its comments and a cult have in common?
We have a case of Witzelsucht.
If you are what you eat, does that mean all squirrels are nuts?