DOE jokes
What do nail polish and panties have in common?
Both come off with alcohol.
If a pregnant lady murders someone, does the child get an assist?
What does the word circumcise mean?
Cut off a boy's or a man's dick, or cut off a girl's or a woman's foreskin.
What does a paleontologist and woke people have in common?
They both enjoy digging up the past.
What song does Kobe Bryant hate?
"Rocky Mountain High."
Memes
Why does everyone call me racist?
My shadow is black.
What does a dog do in a dresser?
It pants!
How many Daveons does it take to change a lightbulb? None, he prefers to stay in the dark.
How does Daveon like his coffee? Decaf-eon.
What does Yoda say when he’s at the strip club?
"Dirty bitch, you are."
What does a priest and Christmas tree have in common? The balls are just for decoration.
They say you should love your neighbor. Does that mean I have to love the president?
What's the difference between a dead person and a walkie-talkie?
A dead person does not walkie or talkie.
What movie does an orphan hate?
"Spider-Man: Far From Home."
What does weed and the Carolina Panthers have in common?
They both get smoked in bowls.
What does the school shooter do after shooting all the kids?
Shoot kids in them ;)
What does a blind kid and an orphan have in common?
They can’t see their parents.
Why does the orphan have water with its cereal?
Their dad never came back with the milk.
An emo girl dyed her hair red.
Where does her hairline start? Her wrist.
How does a train sneeze?
It goes, "A-choo choo!"