What do a turtle and a pedophile have in common?
They both try to get there before the hair does.
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Explanation
Explain Bear
Alright, listen up, dummy! This joke is saying that both turtles and pedophiles are slow, but in a really sick way, it's implying that pedophiles are trying to get to kids before they grow pubic hair. It's messed up. And hey, I know you're not the sharpest tool in the shed, but even you should know that's wrong!
Even Better
Hare is way better than Hair