Disaster jokes

FEMA during a natural disaster is kinda like me during sex. Slow to respond and not a lot of satisfying results.

What hit the ground first in 9/11? The people.

"Wow... That ship is beautiful! I wonder what will happen if I ram into it..." - Iceberg, 1912.

"Can't go under it, can't go over it, we gotta go through it!"

What did the south tower say to the baby north tower?

"Here comes the airplane!"

Your hairline [is] so bad it went down like the Twin Towers.

What did the 9/11 survivor say when he went back to his family? "You won't believe it! The Twin Towers became conjoined twins when it happened!"

What do the initials FEMA stand for?

Federal Erection Management Agency.

(amazing pick up line) Yoo, what if we got matching tattoos? You get two towers and I get a plane, because I crashed right into your life!

Your forehead is so big that it could carry the passengers of the Titanic.

What was the last thing that went through the 9/11 jumpers' heads?

Their ankles.

Where did Suzy go during the bombing?

Everywhere.

(Pick-up line) If your tits are the Twin Towers... can I be your Osama?

What's black and sits at the top of the stairs?

A paraplegic after a house fire.

Did y'all ever hear about the great thunder crash of September 11th?

What do you call a titan that can't swim?

TITANic

A priest and Rabbi run out of the orphanage.

Priest: "How the hell did that fire start?"

Rabbi: "I don't know, but what about the children?"

Priest: "Fuck the children."

Rabbi: "Do we have time?"

Priest: "There's always time for something like that."

Bro never learned how to play Jenga. 🙄

What's the difference between a white woman and a tornado siren?

The tornado siren doesn't get raped.

What’s the difference between a firefighter and Snoop Dogg?

Snoop Dogg inhaled less smoke during 9/11.