Didnt jokes
Why did the electron leave the atom?
Because it didn't want to be argon.
One weekend some distant family members that I hadn't met before came over. My cousins (who I also hadn't met before) were fighting, so I decided to separate them and place them in opposite corners of the room (thinking it would help).
My mom took me to an empty room with tears in her eyes and told me they both ended up dying.
Well, SO-RRY, but I didn't know they were conjoined twins.
An orphan girl's boyfriend broke up with her, what was his reason?
"If her parents didn't want her, why should I?"
Why didn't the Japanese guy get a high five? Logan Paul left him hanging.
Why didn't anyone care about the circus?
Because it was irr-elephant.
If God didn’t mean for us to have sex with 11-year-old girls, why did he make them so sexy and so much physically weaker?
Why did the elephant cross the road? It didn't see the cars.
Why didn't the butcher cut the fillet?
Because it was a misteak.
Kobe missed a lot of shots, but he sure didn’t miss the mountain.
Who's a pineapple? I'm a pineapple... Yass.
Teacher and kid.
Kid: Hey, teacher.
Teacher: Yes?
Kid: Would you punish me for something I didn't do?
Teacher: Of course not.
Kid: Well, I didn't do my homework!
I didn't trip and fall... I attacked the floor, and I believe I am winning :3
Why didn't they just switch him on and off again, or switch his batteries?
Why didn’t the girl like stairs?
They were always up to something.
How did Stephen Hawking die? Because he didn't charge his batteries.
Do you know who didn't graduate high school this year?
The Parkland kids.
A man finds his son climbing the roof of his house. The kid kept using all sorts of material to climb up, but the dad didn't pay much attention.
Next day the kid went to the state tower and kept climbing using some adhesive gloves. The dad asks his son for a second time: "Son! Why are you doing this?" The son replies: "You told me to aim up high!"
John saw a Gay in a wheelchair.
"I didn't know a man could be a fruit and a Vegetable!"
Donald Trump didn't build a wall because he likes going to islands to touch little girls.
Why didn't the toilet paper cross the road? Because it was stuck in a crack.
What’s the difference between Isaac Newton and my Dad?
Isaac Newton didn’t beat me half to death with a pipe wrench.