Degree jokes
Beethoven to Chris Doemges: "What instrument do you play outside in the Arctic at -12 degrees Celsius?"
Doemges: "Probably the shiver..."
If your house is cold, just stand in the corner. It's always 90 degrees there.
Why didn't the right angle go to college? Because he had 90 degrees.
Why are corners so hot?
They are always 90 degrees.
Why are mountains so smart?
'Cause they have a degree.
Mom: Anna, let your younger brother have the sled one half of the time, and you the other half. That way it will all be fair, and I don't have to put up with this crying. I've already got seven others to take care of.
Anna: I do, Mom. I have Fred (younger brother) go up, and I go down!
Mom: Good. Now how 'bout the rest of you go play outside? It's beautiful out there! It's the warmest it's been all year, 45 degrees below 0!
Kids: Wow! I never thought it would warm up! I love Alaska!
Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a bucket of water.
WHERE DO THEY REALLY GO BECAUSE WATER CAN NOT BE AT THE TOP OF A HILL!?. I honestly think that only people with a physics degree can make nursery rhythms.
What do you call a ride that drops 180 degrees?
Cold as hell.
How many degrees does it take to change ice into boiling water?
199, because the difference between -100 and +100 is 199 (excluding the zero, because it's not real and it doesn't exist because it's not real).
Get?
Why was Boiling Water hired by NASA (The National Aeronautics and Space Administration) to oversee their Space division?
Because it has at least one hundred degrees.
If you ever get cold, just stand in a corner. There's usually 90 degrees.
The doctor told me my temperature was exactly 98.6 degrees. I felt relieved until he said, “Celsius.”
Why did the sun not go to college? Because it already has a million degrees!
Why was Trump banned from music class? He kept putting his finger on D minor.
What was Clinton encouraged to get in college? A minor.
What do you call a rapper with a PhD?
A rap scholar.
How many degreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees does Billy Corgan have?
1979.
Egg shaped, dome, bowling ball lookin' ass, bald fuck with that 360 degrees ahh head, motherfucker look like a damn balloon.
Call me Kobe 'cause I'm finna use your head as a basketball and throw it at yo' parents. Mr. Clean, bootleg Saitama lookin' ass mfer. No hair? :(
We can only see 90 degrees.
If you measured your hairline with a protractor, it would show 90 degrees.
I got in an argument with the 90-degree angle. And guess what? It was right!