Death jokes
My dad died when we couldn’t remember his blood type. As he died, he kept insisting for us to “be positive,” but it’s hard without him.
I got jealous when my phone died.
"Meow, meow, woof, woof." That's what animals say to me when I die.
Why do my kids die?
Stinky Oussy :D
I don't have much motivation for things, that's why I haven't yet killed myself, hehe.
Why do you put a baby into a blender feet first?
So you can see the look on its face...
As I grow older, I remember all the people I lost along the way. Maybe tour guide wasn't the right career choice for me...
Funny thing is, dead women can't say no...
Fatty and Skinny sitting in a bed.
Fatty rolled over, and Skinny was dead.
My dick actually destroyed the Death Star.
What hits the ground first, the feather or the emo?
The feather, because the emo is hung in the tree.
I wasn't close to my father when he died. Which is lucky because he stepped on a landmine.
How many babies does it take to paint the side of a barn?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
If only Karen Carpenter had eaten Mama Cass's sandwich...
How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb?
More than five because my basement is still dark.
My grandmother made her passage on a boat. The thing wasn’t the only thing that went down.
What's the difference between Isaac Newton and the baby I just killed?
Isaac Newton died a virgin!😎
These jokes make me want to die.
How do you make a dead baby float?
Two scoops of ice cream, one scoop of dead baby!
What did they do with his body when he died?
They made him into Lego so kids can play with him for once.