Death jokes

Who’s stronger in a relationship, a man or a woman? A woman, because it takes six men to carry him to his grave; it only takes one woman to put him there.

What do Spider-Man and suicidal people have in common?

They both hang.

I have a question: Does aging affect corpses, too?

Just asking to know if I still count as a pedophile or not!

I had a friend who was a dwarf. He committed suicide. He jumped off a curb.

Some people say I like heights; others say I'm a daredevil.

In reality, I like killing myself.

I make suicidal jokes because I am a suicidal joke. And now for my closing act at the end of the rope.

Q: What's yellow and floats?

A: A bus full of children.

I never forget my grandpa's last words.

"Are you still holding the ladder?"

My mum told me to stop telling the suicidal jokes.

I replied with: "Don't worry, suicide would be the last thing I'd do."

What does a Travis Scott concert and the Titanic cabin have in common? The music doesn’t stop when people start dying.

That moment when the emo kid hangs himself in a bathroom stall, and the autistic kid thinks it's a pinata.

Technoblade would love it here.

If you give someone a plane ticket, they will fly for a day, but if you push them out of a plane, they'll fly for the rest of their life.

What song did the Titanic victims listen to as they died?

Ice, Ice Baby!!

When you're depressed about the world :( but you remember you will soon die :)

It's Christmas morning, and all the decorations are done, but the tree looks like it's missing something. *grabs the noose*

A friend of mine used to be morbidly obese, but after lots of exercise and hard work... We were able to lift his coffin.

What do you call a decapitated politician?

A severed head of state.

What is worse than a baby getting hanged in a tree?

That same baby getting hanged in multiple trees.

The IRS hates when you don't have to pay your taxes with this one mind-blowing trick.