Death jokes

My friend told me to make more friends, so I joined a suicide cult.

I’ll be hanging with them for a while.

Yo mama so fat, when they buried her, they named her Everest. Mount Everest.

My grandpa's last words before he died in Vietnam were, "What the fuck did I step on?"

Me: I saw your parents yesterday.

Orphan girl: Where?

Me: The coffin was still open.

शाला टाइटैनिक को भी यमलोक जाना पड़ा। हम तो आदमी है।

Shala, even Titanic had to go to Yamlok. We are just men.

Kobe Bryant ain’t flying that well anymore.

If mom saw you, she would die and be happy because of you being ugly.

Q: What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies?

A: A Lamborghini isn't a very fun hobby.

What is yellow and can’t swim? A school, but full of drowning kids! 🤣🤣🤣

I was crying when Sasha died in AOT, I also got jealous.

My first thought when I read Betty Pear's obituary was, "Thank God for Alzheimer's!"

Once I was riding my bike and saw a $5. I jumped off and died.

A few days after her husband’s death, a widow accidentally receives an email from a man waiting for his wife in Spain.

The email reads: "Dearest Wife, just got checked in. Everything [is] prepared for your arrival tomorrow. P. S. It’s really hot down here!"

Are you my fish? Because you're supposed to be dead.

After a suicide joke say, "Don't leave me hanging, or I'll cut it out."

Once my twin brother died from a plane crash. His last words were, "If it's a bomb, I'll give it a 9/11."

Why did the dead baby cross the road?

It was strapped to the chicken.

I was outside digging a six-foot hole when I found a treasure box with jewels and shiny gems! I almost went inside to tell my wife, then I remembered why I was digging the hole.

"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Knife." "Knife, who?" "How are you still alive? I just stabbed you!"

Cremation: Your last chance for a smoking hot body.