Death jokes
Robin Williams' death was the most horrible impression ever given. (RIP Robin Williams, you will be missed!)
"FUCK FUCK FUCK MY CLOTHES CAUGHT THE FLAME OH MY GOD IT BURNS SO MUCH!"
Why did the orphan like milk?
Because their parents went to get milk and never came back!
I told my grampa hello, and I said, "Hope you die!" hahahhhhahahahahahhahahahhahaha
I found a child on the street homeless, and they were really nice, so I took them home. Then I said, "Who's better, Biden or Trump?" They said they support Trump. They are now dead in my basement and have been for 3 years.
What's 6ft long, red, and my girlfriend cries when I feed it to her?
A miscarriage.
When I die, I want my body to be cremated.
And fucked! Fucked really hard, papí!! Like a real whore!! Like a real tramp!! Stuff your entire cock in there!!! Uhh!! Uhh!!
I got you the candy. Haha! You idiot, it's poison!
My friend's dad died during 9/11. He was such a good pilot, but my friend kept disturbing him, so when his dad died, he said, "It was you who killed me" (to the child).
So the child said, "Yoo-hoo? What type of name is Yoo-hoo, but Yoo-hoo, Yoo-hoo come here, I need to kill you NOW."
I told my wife I needed a blood transfusion when I could not remember. She said, "Be positive too."
Bad, I am now a ghost writing this.
Why did the baby cross the road? Because he wanted to die.
Stephen Hawking drove too far away from the wall and unplugged himself.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
Because his carer lost his charger.
Why did Stephen Hawking die when he logged onto Facebook?
It took all his info!
I went to school and everyone was screaming and looking at me. They weren't after I shot them, though.
Stephen Hawking died because he lost Wi-Fi connection.
The reason Stephen Hawking died was because his ethernet cable disconnected.
People named Joey are autistic and need to die fatty.
Suicide bombers, carry bombs and remember to breathe.
Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream?
Because he was dead.