Death

Death jokes

Child

How are an emo kid and a hanging child the same?

Depends on who's hanging.

Cock

I fed a vegan cock. No, not chicken, no, not my cock, my dead dad's.

Paul Walker

Did you hear that nursing homes keep returning the new Paul Walkers?

They let the elderly move fast, but then burst into flames and burn the patients alive.

Rape victim

How can you tell when a female became a rape victim? She crossed herself out, hanging by with a Carlton dry.

Skeleton

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party?

Because he was arrested on suspicion of murder.

Cheese

My sister said I was only allowed to grate cheese, so I said to her that I’d prove her wrong.

The next day my mum asked me why my cheese was tan, and I said it was my own special recipe. My mum loved the cheese but she didn’t like it much after the funeral.

Friend

My friend told me that he saw a yacht went close in to the yeti's eye, so I said to my friend, "Did the yeti kiss?" But my friend said, "No, the yeti have to play games every single day, or the yeti will die."

Orphan

Why do orphans not have parents?

Answer: Their parents are yeet dead dead.

Chicken

Why did the chicken cross the road because he wanted to get run over and poop, and he died for 30 years until he was sent to Joe for getting run over, and he got killed by something, and then he died, and then he got it by you poop.

People

I have a riddle for you:

10 people are on a boat, but they all die due to a tsunami except the captain.

Then, when he gets home, his wife serves him “penguin meat.”

Once he eats it, he starts crying.

Why?

Nun

What's black and white and can't turn around in a corridor?

A nun with a javelin through her neck.

Bro

Bro told me this when he passed away.

I’m “Fading.”