Death jokes
Dad: You're adopted.
Son: Where are my real parents?
Dad: >:D They are dead, now come to their grave and sleep there.
A man walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "What, no soap?" Then he dies and she marries the barber.
So I was on Google, and on my computer it had Windows. When Stephen Hawking died, it shut down, the shutdown sound played, and wouldn't turn on again.
Lil’ Johnny be dead, you fools!
What is it called if your mom does not make it to your birth?...
An abortion.
JACK smoked some shit in the casino bathroom.
Then fucked a slut, played some slots, took some shots, then shot a JOKER!
It's a sad story, because JACK killed himself, but he died with a smile.
An old man walks in a forest with a child, and the child says, "It's dark, and I'm scared." The old man says, "How do you think I feel? I have to walk out alone."
The reason Stephen Hawking died was because he switched WiFi routers from Sky to Virgin, so his computer lagged out.
My marriage was on the rocks, so I buried my wife under some.
How did Sally die?
She got shot.
How? She could not run away.
My dick actually destroyed the Death Star.
I'm gonna cut my life off.
What's black and white and can't turn around in a corridor?
A nun with a javelin through her neck.
Best way of abortion?
Beyblade abortion.
LET IT R.I.P.
Kobe likes his shoes like the way he died.
Air.
My friend told me that he saw a yacht went close in to the yeti's eye, so I said to my friend, "Did the yeti kiss?" But my friend said, "No, the yeti have to play games every single day, or the yeti will die."
Why do orphans not have parents?
Answer: Their parents are yeet dead dead.
They laughed at my crayon drawing.
I laughed at their chalk outline.
Why did Wilson die? Cuz he sucks!
A bullet is like an arrow.
Nothing can stop it from going through your head.