Death jokes
I was digging in our garden when I found a chest full of gold coins. I was about to run straight home to tell my wife about it, but then I remembered why I was digging in our garden.
The earth was once flat... until they buried your mom.
Why do orphans have no parents?
Say your joke in the comments.
My grandfather says I'm too reliant on technology. I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.
What do you do when you see a naked dead girl?
Check your map, you're obviously going in circles.
Why did Princess Diana cross the road? - 'Cause she wasn't wearing a seatbelt.
I like my women like my coffee—ground up and frozen.
Go Kermit, toaster bath.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
Because his son wanted to charge their phone, so they unplugged him.
As I was eating this girl out, I thought I tasted some horse semen... I exclaimed, "Oh, Grandma! That's how you died!"
Two men are in a rainforest, and one of them is peeing. Suddenly, a snake jumps out of some bushes and bites the man’s penis. The other man says, “Oh my God, I will go to a doctor immediately!” He didn’t have enough time to load the man into the car, so he went straight to the hospital. The man told the doctor what happened, and the doctor said, “You will have to make an incision at the wound and suck the poison out.” The man went back to the other man and said, “There is no hope, you will die.”
How did the gay man die? Homicide.
Hey girl, are you suicide? 'Cause I think of you everyday.
What is George Floyd's favorite shade of color? Kneeon.
You know what relationships and life? They both come to an end.
Number 1 ventriloquist dies at age 76, will be mist.
Helicopter, helicopter, Kobe Bryant in my chopper, Sitting next to burning daughter, Lots of smoke and little laughter.
My grief counselor died today. He did such a great job. I don't even care.
As tragic as school shootings are, it's also a quick way to a late-term abortion.
Why did the orphan cross the road?
Because they thought they saw their parents. (Plot twist: the orphan got ran over.)