Death jokes
The only reason he died was because Virgin Media wifi crashed.
Gwen, we can chat in 2 months. My aunt just died from COVID, and it is taking forever for us to get there to California. I love you, your boyfriend, Prince!
Technoblade was the second worst thing that happened to orphans.
Guys, they weren’t always orphans!
What's one thing you should never ask a suicidal person? "Are you okay?" because the next day they'll either be dead or have a lot more cuts than they started with.
To those who are dead now, was it fun?
When the school shooter kills five people, and the autistic kid yells, "Heroes never die!"
I heard Microsoft got charged, why?
They couldn’t reboot Stephen Hawking.
When Stephen Hawking died, he saw the stairway to Heaven.
He thought to himself, "Oh God, this is awkward!"
What was the last thing that went through JFK's mind? A bullet.
I love my family when they're buried alive.
Hang in there, ya emo bastards! Remember, you could always be dead. Oh, too soon?
No wonder they wanna die so much. I'd wanna die too if I was a freak who listens to Black Veil Brides!
Anybody got a knife? I mean, an emo dildo?
When Lexa took Clarke out on a date, she walked past the candle shop, and she bought all the candles. After the date, they went back to the Heda's (Commander's) Tower, which is basically a huge candle. "All I wanna do is Candle you!"
I help suicidal people.
BTW verb not adjective.
There are three people on an island. One dies, and the second guy goes to bury them. He comes back with deer meat. The first guy eats it, but the second guy refuses the meal.
When the men return to the mainland, they part ways. The first man goes to eat the deer again at a local restaurant. He takes one bite, then jumps off a bridge.
In heaven, an angel asks him why.
“Well you see,” he answered, “that man was a tribal cannibal. Delicious in my wife’s meat, though.”
Little Johnny died.
Q: What's the difference between a grandma fetish and necrophilia?
A: A few weeks.
Say this out loud: "Gabe Itch."
Suicide
How do you kill a Catholic?
Crucify them...
"Sing in music lesson"
"I want to die, I want to die, I want to choke myself, break my neck and die."
Why did Steven Hawking die?
A quad rasher ran him over.