Death jokes
A guy says to his dog, "Where are you?" The dog was actually dead, bro.
What hit the floor first, the emo or the apple? The apple, the rope stopped the emo.
A bully told an orphan to cry to his parents, so he did.
His adoptive parents were very supportive about the situation, and everything was settled. He died in an accident a day later.
What fell first, the emo kid or the leaf? The leaf, 'cause the emo kid just hung.
When you die, scientists will preserve your skull.
Do you know what organ remains warm even after a woman dies?
My penis (or rather my neutron laser priming its firing sequence).
What do you call a pig that goes to the slaughterhouse? Technoblade.
What's yellow and can't swim? A school bus full of orphans.
My mom said she would miss me if I committed suicide, so we made it double.
My great uncle died in a concentration camp.
He fell off one of the guard towers.
The guy who stole my diary just died. My thoughts are with his family.
Don’t have sex. Because you will get pregnant. And die.
Technoblade never got a wife.
So an emo shot themselves, and so the detective decides to ask why, but it just goes in one ear and out the other.
Thanks for the birthday wishes. It's been an odd one this year, as some of you know, my father suddenly passed away on my birthday last year, and anyone who knew the old man knew he had a sledgehammer wit!
Good on ya dad, ya definitely got the last laugh!
When an orphan finds out who their parents are, and then finds out they're dead.
How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw 'em.
Ammon died.
My wife walked in on me cheating on her and said, "How could you cheat on me?!" I said, "She was lying naked on the table what I was supposed to do?" and my wife responded with, "Perform the autopsy."
What do you call a person with a hole in their head? Dead.