Death jokes
pilot: *over intercom* we're all going to die.
passengers: *start freaking out*
pilot: all of us will one day, no one knows when.
passengers: *sigh with relief*
pilot: but it'll probably be when we hit that mountain.
The parents used to hit him.
His parents got into a car crash and died.
He became an orphan in an orphanage. The people there hit him. He looked up and said "Parents?"
The whole reason he is dead is because he kept hitting "Remind me later" on his Windows Updates.
Are you a grave, 'cause I want you on me?
Two men walked into a bar, and one man asked for H20, and the other man asked for H20 too.
Only one man came out alive.
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
Error, error, error.
System shutting down.
What do you call a pedophile who's dying? You.
I'm going to hang myself in the bathroom at school and put a note telling kids that I'm a piñata.
I'm a fast reader, I can go through 20 stories in a few seconds.
If you bet on Russian roulette, even if you win, you still lose.
What’s the difference between peanut butter and a dead baby?
Dogs only lick peanut butter off private parts.
Man 1: Hey, I heard you survived a school shooting. What was it like?
Man 2: People were screaming and running everywhere. I was only able to get a few of them.
Orphan
What do you call Juice WRLD in a coffin?
A juice box...
Someone telling a joke:
Boy: "My parents are dead."
Girl: "My grandad is too."
Orphan who listened to it: "That joke is dead!"
Person who told the joke: "So is your family!"
How many babies does it take to paint a wall red?
It depends on how hard you throw them. 😈😈
I read the Brothers Grimm books, then I see a black figure reaping about.
I realized someone has died, but I don't do anything about it. I continue to read, and that's when I realized that I was one of the characters, in which at the end, dies.
I used to have a son, but he died the same way Eric Clapton's son died. For inspiration.
How do you make an emo jump?
A bridge.
What's big, black, and touches children?
Harambe.