Death jokes
Hitler killed 18 million and only died once.
Fucking camper!
What's the difference between the Twin Towers and the people at the old folks home?
They both collapsed.
My friend told me to make more friends, so I joined a suicide cult.
I’ll be hanging with them for a while.
What was the last thing that went through the heads of the 9/11 jumpers?
Their ankles.
Why did the serial killer cross the road? To get to the victim's house.
Knock, knock. Who's there? The serial killer.
It says the truth
What is an orphan's excuse to leave a party?
"I'm gonna make like my parents and run."
Before I die, I'm going to ask to be cremated.
Then I'm going to eat a bunch of popcorn kernels.
Then I'll die and get cremated. BOOM! I'm popcorn!
When you're banging the class slut and the school shooter says to leave his corpses alone.
How did Billy find out he was in a minefield?
He saw his dad's corpse holding a jug of milk.
Where did little Lucy go during the bombing?
Everywhere.
I made a website for orphans. It doesn’t have a home page.
What’s the difference between a Lamborghini and a dead body? I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.
What is the difference between Iron Man and Iron Woman? One is a superhero and the other is a simple command.
What's the difference between a Lambo and a pile of dead babies?
I don't have a Lambo in my garage.
What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Mustang Challenger?
I don't have a Mustang Challenger in my garage.
Kurt Cobain's last job was a blow job. He blew his head clean off.
I never forget my grandpa's last words.
"Are you still holding the ladder?"
Do you know what the secret is to have a smoking, hot body as a senior citizen?
Cremation.
I'll never forget my dad's last words before he kicked the bucket: "Hey, look how far I can kick this bucket!"
My mum told me to stop telling the suicidal jokes.
I replied with: "Don't worry, suicide would be the last thing I'd do."
I don’t know why people don’t say "Cobain," because I’m pretty sure Kurt Cobain didn’t miss his last shot like Kobe did.
Yo mama so stupid, when her phone dies, she buries it.