Death jokes
How do you bury a prostitute?
In a Y-shaped coffin.
A man is digging in his garden and finds a gold chest. He goes to tell his wife.
Then he remembers why he was digging in the garden...
"Stop telling these orphan jokes!! Maybe some people that read these are orphans!"
I'll stop telling orphan jokes when their parents come back.
Why doesn’t Helen Keller go to the optometrist?
Because she’s dead.
One of my friends named Jill had a drug overdose.
She didn’t have any of that drug after that. For the rest of her life, she acted very high. When she died, it was because of natural causes, not the drug. So this proves that a lethal dose is also a life time supply.
Memes
Did you know Princess Diana had dandruff?
Yea, they found her “head and shoulders“ on the backseat of her car.
Some people think Bin Laden is dead, but some think he's alive.
He is the Al-Qaeda Elvis.
Yo mama so stupid, when her phone dies, she buries it.
What do you call an orphan with parents?
I don't know... what?
Kidnapped. :)
What makes a child an orphan?
Their parents left them for good. :D
What do you do when you see a naked dead girl?
Check your map, you're obviously going in circles.
Wanna know why Kobe can't shoot?
Because he's dead.
The Earth was flat until yo mama buried herself.
One good thing about lynching during the holidays, free tree ornaments.
What makes an orphan jump?
A bridge.
A suicidal boy went up to a tree and said "hi".
The tree never responded; it left him hanging.
Guy 1: Hey, can you stop making 9/11 jokes? My dad died during it.
Guy 2: Sorry, I will stop. What was your dad?
Guy 1: The pilot. He saw a KFC and wanted it, so, well, you know.
Do you know what the secret is to have a smoking, hot body as a senior citizen?
Cremation.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them.
What is red, green, lies in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs?
...A girl scout that got hit by a car.