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Death

Death jokes

I recently was told by my therapist to stop with the suicide jokes. So I replied with "Don't worry, it will all end soon."

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    • One night, I saw a woman sitting behind a dumpster. So I took her home. We talked all the way there. When we got home, I gave her a bath. Later on, things started getting passionate. We started doing intercourse, and some of the noises she made you would have thought she was still alive!

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    • An orphan walks on a path asking for his mum. Soon he remembers he doesn't have a mum.

    (Also, I had sex with ur mum. She was screaming "daddy~")

    Why did the chicken cross the road because he wanted to get run over and poop, and he died for 30 years until he was sent to Joe for getting run over, and he got killed by something, and then he died, and then he got it by you poop.

    What’s green and orange and sits at the bottom of the swimming pool?

    A baby with burst armbands.

    I will never forget my grandfather's last words: “The fuck you doing with that knife?”

    My dad drove past a graveyard. He said, "I won't be buried there." I asked why.

    He said, "Because I am not dead yet!"

    My jokes are pretty "bone-arifick," if I say so myself. Hehhehe... Get it?

    The other day while I was going down on my grandma, I thought I tasted a little horse semen and I got to wondering if maybe that’s what killed her!