Day jokes

You were sad because your grandmother died.

The next day, you were washing your face, and you realize sadness made your face BLUE.

Azibo works 10 hours a day in the sun and is paid 1 euro an hour. Thanks to a fundraiser we will be able to raise the necessary funds to buy a whip to make him work twice as much.

Guys, you shouldn't joke about 9/11.

My great-uncle died that day. Best damn pilot in Iraq.

Chuck Norris has come in contact with Covid.

Covid is now in a 14-day quarantine.

I got fired my first day at the bank. This old lady told me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.

I saw a bus the other day with some boy scouts at the back. One of them was having fun getting his knot-tying badge.

What did John say to little Timmy? Happy Disable day!

Just remembering the day when the Jets beat the New York Giants.

Is it just me, or are you the prettiest person I've seen today?

He never has a bad day because he always wakes up on both sides of the bed.

On the first day of school, the teacher asked a student, "What are your parent's names?"

The student replied, "My father's name is Laughing and my mother's name is Smiling."

The teacher said, "Are you kidding?"

The student said, "No, Kidding is my brother, I am Joking."

Don’t feel bad about this day because there’s a saying: "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the present."

Did you hear about the guy that went to a nudist colony? The first day was his hardest.

I heard an unusual word the other day: "Opaque."

Unfortunately, what it means is unclear.

Why did the turkey cross the road?

Because it was the chicken's day off!

One day I was just sitting around when my butthole began to grow larger. It grew and grew and began to engulf the other parts of my body until it swallowed them all. Now I am just a big butthole typing this. Please help me!

A guy stuffed some cigarettes up his eyes thinking it would make him see colors.

The next day, he could see only one color... black.

Better Friday the 13th than Monday the 13th.

I found Jeffrey Epstein’s diary the other day.

The last entry was about 12 years old.

Where can white people cook better than Black people?

On Father’s Day.