Day jokes

I told an orphan there were 363 days in a year.

I once was playing with my friend and Roblox girlfriend, then one day, they cheated on me. I broke up with her and unfriended him, then I saw my mom and my uncle crying!

Me be like: ;-;

Chuck Norris has come in contact with Covid.

Covid is now in a 14-day quarantine.

Guys, you shouldn't joke about 9/11.

My great-uncle died that day. Best damn pilot in Iraq.

Azibo works 10 hours a day in the sun and is paid 1 euro an hour. Thanks to a fundraiser we will be able to raise the necessary funds to buy a whip to make him work twice as much.

Went swimming today and peed in the deep end. The lifeguard saw me and blew his whistle so loud I almost fell in.

I beat up a deaf kid the other day. I had to. He kept throwing up gang signs.

I'm afraid for my gay calendar. Its days are numbered!

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Sally had 69 boobs, which was 222 many, 69,222. So she went to the doctor on 51st street, 69,222,51, who gave her pills. She took them 8 times a day, and now she is boobless.

You know if you poo on the toilet at 11:59 PM...

Then at 12:01 AM, it's just the same shit, different day...

People have been telling me that you can get things for free now.

The other day I saw a sign saying "FREE PALESTINE."

Just remembering the day when the Jets beat the New York Giants.

I'm 17, right? Anyways, the other day my parents told me a joke they made 17 years ago, but they still haven't told the joke yet.

I overdosed on Viagra yesterday.

It was the hardest day of my life.

I got fired my first day at the bank. This old lady told me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.

One day, a little girl was texting her friend. "Guess what, Angelica!" said the little girl.

"What?" Angelica replied.

"I'm a guy."

You were sad because your grandmother died.

The next day, you were washing your face, and you realize sadness made your face BLUE.

I saw a bus the other day with some boy scouts at the back. One of them was having fun getting his knot-tying badge.

What's the difference between Monday and a dick?

They're not different. They're both unnecessarily long and hard.

9/11 2001... that day was fire🔥