Dating jokes

Dear Gwen and Prince,

Gwen and Prince, sorry for being mean and cussing and other messed up nonsense. To be honest, I really just wanted to be your friends, all both of you! BTW Prince, Gwen is not dating Aiden...I don't even know who Aiden is! Sorry a million times, Zreina.

Why doesn't the orphan date the girl?

Because she is a home-y.

"I work with animals," the guy says to his Tinder date.

"That's so sweet," she replies. "I like a man who loves animals. Where do you work?"

"I'm a butcher," he says.

Angela: Kris, I just met the nicest, sweetest guy ever.

Kristie: Who is he and what is his name?

Angela: His name is Kevin.

Kristie: Kevin? I remember him. He said he had to go to Italy for a meeting, never seen him after that. What the hell is Kevin doing here?

Angela: I don't know.

Attention! Has anyone noticed that Watersharky and Kitten are dating? It's strange because they haven't said anything for 28 DAYS!!! They been keeping it a secret...(I guess). Someone needs to keep track of this. GOD, I just thought further into life with their relationship. DON'T DO THAT.

I saw a pretty girl walking outside. I asked for her number.

We met up and began to have sex. She told me to turn over, which was weird. I felt a stinging pain in my ass all of a sudden.

Girls are like stones.

The flat ones get skipped.

I love to have sex. And my name is Lex. Which one should I be with next? I really hate my ex. I just saw a huge T Rex, And I think you probably saw this text.

Welcome for the rhyme.

Femboys are looking kinda tasty for a date, especially the dick and their balls.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. If he's busy on Valentine's Day, the side chick is you.

Yo mama so hairy that bigfoot dated her.

This isn’t much of a joke, but here's a pickup line. Are you a marshmallow? Because I wanna put my stick in you.

What did the skeleton get when he saw goth girls?......A boner.

I like this Russian girl, but she hasn't asked me to hang off a cliff while drinking vodka.

Three guys walk into a bar: one Asian, one American, one Black.

A girl walks in and says if all three of your D*** sizes don't add up to 12 inches, I will shoot you.

First comes the American with 3 inches, then the Black man with 8.

It totals out to 11 and they look at the Asian and say "Oh no."

He comes to 1 inch to top off the twelve.

She walks away and says ok.

The Asian says, "You're lucky she was hot, so I had a boner!"

Guess how I'm getting laid tonight?

"I'm stronger than you."

"You're pretty, let me take you on a date!" Sike, I lied. You're ugly and fried. What you talking about?

What do you call an emo dating another emo?

The suicide duo.

I like my women like a day: 24 year olds. 24 hours of fun.

What's the best thing about having sex with a 26-year-old?

There's 20 of them.