Dating jokes

Attention! Has anyone noticed that Watersharky and Kitten are dating? It's strange because they haven't said anything for 28 DAYS!!! They been keeping it a secret...(I guess). Someone needs to keep track of this. GOD, I just thought further into life with their relationship. DON'T DO THAT.

I saw a pretty girl walking outside. I asked for her number.

We met up and began to have sex. She told me to turn over, which was weird. I felt a stinging pain in my ass all of a sudden.

Femboys are looking kinda tasty for a date, especially the dick and their balls.

I love to have sex. And my name is Lex. Which one should I be with next? I really hate my ex. I just saw a huge T Rex, And I think you probably saw this text.

Welcome for the rhyme.

Girls are like stones.

The flat ones get skipped.

Yo mama so hairy that bigfoot dated her.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. If he's busy on Valentine's Day, the side chick is you.

What did the skeleton get when he saw goth girls?......A boner.

This isn’t much of a joke, but here's a pickup line. Are you a marshmallow? Because I wanna put my stick in you.

About to go on a date.

But she was late.

So I got some tape.

And eventually punished her with rape.

I like this Russian girl, but she hasn't asked me to hang off a cliff while drinking vodka.

Three guys walk into a bar: one Asian, one American, one Black.

A girl walks in and says if all three of your D*** sizes don't add up to 12 inches, I will shoot you.

First comes the American with 3 inches, then the Black man with 8.

It totals out to 11 and they look at the Asian and say "Oh no."

He comes to 1 inch to top off the twelve.

She walks away and says ok.

The Asian says, "You're lucky she was hot, so I had a boner!"

"You're pretty, let me take you on a date!" Sike, I lied. You're ugly and fried. What you talking about?

What do you call an emo dating another emo?

The suicide duo.

Guess how I'm getting laid tonight?

"I'm stronger than you."

I like my women like a day: 24 year olds. 24 hours of fun.

What's the best thing about having sex with a 26-year-old?

There's 20 of them.

Are you a race car?

Cuz I’m tryna fuck.

What happened to the woman who dated a rapist?

She was date raped.

Alicia was not a popular girl. None of the guys noticed her. Once she got a boyfriend, but then he cheated on her with Katy and said, "You're not sexy enough, Katy is much hotter."

So Alicia took a match, set herself on fire, and screamed, "THIS GIRL IS ON FIRE!"

And then she died.