Dating jokes
Femboys are looking kinda tasty for a date, especially the dick and their balls.
This is the log reference. Use it to post your logs. Logs can be posted by Info Gatherers or Announcers.
/{[(Log date) -Month- -Year- -Day-] -Log Title- } "-Log Information- " End of Log
Thank you, -Connor
Guys, help! I need advice to confess to my crush. I'm being for real right now, guys, help!
"{[(Log date) 11 22 3] The Beginning} "This marks the first ever log of the Underground Fruit Association of n&c (ugfa). N, being code name for Nathaniel, and C, being code name for Connor. Our plan is to collect as many fruit cups as possible by the end of the year. This site will be a communication hub only and used for nothing else. We will plan and discuss courses of action, and collection." End of log"
Why is it hard to break up with a Japanese girl?
Because you have to drop the bomb twice for her to get it.
Are you a ghost train? Because I am going to scream when I ride you.
I used to date a girl with a lazy eye. Turns out she was seeing someone else the whole time.
My ex.
Are you a noose, 'cause I wanna hang out with you?
I asked my phone why I couldn't get a date.
It showed a picture of myself.
"I work with animals," a man said on his Tinder date. "That's so sweet," she replies. "I love a man who works with animals. Where do you work?" "At the butcher shop!"
Your mom was dating a boy that had a twin brother, but she did it with the wrong one.
Are you my homework because Iβm supposed to be doing you right now, but Iβm not.
Are you a tree? Cuz Iβm trying to hang with you. ;)
Ask someone if they are a rhino. If they say yes, tell them "so you're horny." And if they reply yes again, block them from your life entirely.
Who wants to be my boyfriend, please?
I donβt have another talking stage in me. π€¦πΏββοΈ Do you squirt, and is your BD dead? π
Me: And this is the room I cry in.
Date: You've said that about every room.
Me: Correct!
A woman was sitting alone at a bar, and a man approached her. He asked her why she looked so sad. She responded that her boyfriend had just broken up with her because she was too kinky.
The man expressed his amazement when he admitted that his girlfriend had dumped him because of his fetishes. After a few drinks, they decided to go back to her place.
When they arrived, she told him to make himself comfortable while she freshened up. The man complied. After a long time, she burst open her bedroom door and said, "I hope you're ready!"
She stood in the doorway wearing a latex body suit and a gas mask. She had a whip in one hand, a flogger in the other hand, and a 12-inch strap-on dangling between her thighs.
The dude looked at her and said, "Thanks, but I'm good for the night!"
She said, "I thought you said that you were kinky."
The dude replied, "While you were in there, I f-cked your cat, pissed in your plants, and came on your curtains. It's been fun!"
Are your parents bakers? Because you're a cutie pie.
Are you a loan? Because you've got my interest.
Is your dad a boxer? Because youβre a knockout!
If you were a vegetable, youβd be a cute-cumber.
Are you an artist? Because youβre really good at drawing me in.
I believe in following my dreams. Can I have your Instagram?
If you were a fruit, youβd be a fine-apple.
If you were a flower, you'd be a daaaaaamn-delion!