How do you get an emo down from a tree?
Cut the rope!
I lost my virginity to a girl with Down syndrome. I wanted my first time to be special.
I once saw a noose joke.
I wanna know how to make one :D
Why is America bad at playing Clash of Clans?
Because they already lost two towers.
Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for a few hours.
Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
Husband: Dammit, Alice! I'm your husband, and I'm telling you that you better stay in this kitchen if you know what's good for you!
Wife: Go to hell, Bob! I'm leaving!
Ignoring my protective advice, Alice stormed out of our underground kitchen, even though it was the safest place to be while the nuclear war still raged outside.
Dead baby jokes never get old...
I gave a blind kid a gun and said it was a hair dryer.
How do you get a million fans?
Just run through Africa with a bottle of water.
I got my daughter a trampoline for her birthday. The ungrateful bitch just sat there in her wheelchair and cried.
What did John Cena say to the blind man? "YOU CAN'T SEE ME!"
What do you call a convict in prison for touching little girls? A boy named Brandon.
Republicunts/Cuntservaturds.
Who wants me to bring back the daily School Shooter Jokes?
What’s it called when you give an emo some rope as a present?
Murder.
Joke: I went to a paraplegic strip club the other day, the place was crawling with pussy.
What is common with dark humor and unvaccinated kids?
Neither do ever grow old.
Dark humor is like water; not everyone gets it.
What's long and black?
The line to KFC.
I threw a boomerang a few years ago. I now live in constant fear.
