Dark Humor
Q: Why are medication pills white?
A: Because they work.
What's another name for 9/11?
A forbidden game of Jenga.
Why is America bad at playing Clash of Clans?
Because they already lost two towers.
Why is the bottom of the ocean so dark?
Because the Africans couldn't swim.
Why do Emos always wear black like ninjas?
Because they're always cutting.
I once saw a noose joke.
I wanna know how to make one :D
What do you call an emo with a knife?
A cutting board.
I visited my new friend in his apartment. He told me to make myself at home.
So I threw him out. I hate having visitors.
Two friends were hanging out with each other next to a tree.
Too bad only one was standing. :)
How do you get an emo down from a tree?
Cut the rope!
Why did the emo go to the store?
To buy bleach.
Dentist: “This will hurt a little.”
Patient: “OK.”
Dentist: “I’m having an affair with your wife!”
If I had a dime for every time someone has told me to kill myself, I'd be a millionaire.
Me and my girlfriend were walking in the woods.
Her: I am scared!
Me: What do you think I feel? I have to walk back alone.
What's long and black?
The line to KFC.
Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for a few hours.
Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
Husband: Dammit, Alice! I'm your husband, and I'm telling you that you better stay in this kitchen if you know what's good for you!
Wife: Go to hell, Bob! I'm leaving!
Ignoring my protective advice, Alice stormed out of our underground kitchen, even though it was the safest place to be while the nuclear war still raged outside.
Dead baby jokes never get old...
How do you get a million fans?
Just run through Africa with a bottle of water.
I gave a blind kid a gun and said it was a hair dryer.