When my dad left he said he would bring back the milk but 20 years later he only came with my new sister and eggs. And I confronted him and he said "I used all the milk to make your sister"
The last joke about the dad was a joke. Don't take it seriously. Can't believe that people actually think that was true
Dad: "if they jumped off a bridge would you?" Tommy: "yes, cuz there would be a body pile to break my fall!"
Orphans always dip their Oreos in water? Hoping their dad comes back with the milk.
Kid: " Mom I had a scary dream can I come sleep with you and dad " Mom: " sure sweetie sleep in the middle " Kid: " Dad can you get the remote out of my back " Dad: " That isn't the remote "
*Weird background music*
Son: Hey Dad, what's an alcoholic?
Dad: Well son, do you see those 4 cars? An alcoholic would we 8.
Son: Dad, there are only 2 cars.
jack and jill went up the hill to find there dad again
A father and three sons are renovating a house when a wall of that house collapses and breaks the fathers back. Keeping calm he tells the sons, "well, I guess this is what you would call back-breaking labor." He chuckled then passed out from pain.
Your dad never needed a van for you.
Why did little Timmy dip the cookie in water? “ Because his dad never brought the milk.”
My dad coming back.
What’s the difference between you and Jesus? We know who Jesus’s dad was.
I will always remeber my dads last words.... "15 dollars and ill jump."
what happens when you accidentally taught your child to call every man daddy?
you find the real one.
Dad: If you study, then I will buy you a new iPhone. Son: Okay, I'll do it! 5 hours later... Son: I'm done! Dad: I lied. Son: So did I!
I told an orphan his dad is spider man far from home
My dad is now a milkman Now i have over 50 brothers and sisters
My dad is nice 👍
How do you make a handkerchief dance? You put a little boogie in it.
A blind man walks into a bar And a table And a chair
