Cross jokes
Why did my dad cross the road?
To get to the nearest building so he wouldn't die in the crippling smoke of the most terrifying and only terrorist attack on American soil.
Halloween joke:
What do you get when you cross a vampire with a teacher?
A blood test.
I was gonna make a joke about Mexicans but honestly, it crosses the line.
What do you get when you cross a redneck and another redneck?
Incest.
Why did the plane cross the sky?
To hit the Twin Towers...
Memes
Why did the chicken want to cross the road? Because he was suicidal and wanted to get hit by a car.
Why can’t dinosaurs cross the road?
Because they’re dead.
Why did the Muslim man cross the road? To violently rape an eight-year-old girl, then indoctrinate her with Islamic scripture, and train her as a suicide bomber.
Did Jesus cut his nails?
No! His nails cut through him.
Why did the Indian cross the road?
To run away from the Pakistani.
Today, there was a big test for Little Timmy. During the test, Timmy had to take a really huge shit. So, he rushed to the bathroom. He took a while in there.
When he was done, he realized there was no more toilet paper left. Since there was nothing around him to use, the only thing he could do was wipe with his hand. His time in the bathroom was up, and he needed to finish that test! He didn’t have time to wash his hands. So, he hurried back. The problem was, the hand he wiped with was his right hand. He used his left hand to complete the test, which made him fail. When he got home, his mother was standing there crossing her arms. “Timmy, the teacher had called and said you wrote sloppy on your test. Why is that?” Timmy replied, “Oh, it’s because I caught a leprechaun with my right hand, but if I opened it, my classmates would scare him away, so I had to use my left.” Timmy’s mother glared at him with disbelief. “Timmy, I don’t believe you. Now open your hand!” Timmy did so and opened his hand. “See, mother? I said you’d scare the shit out of him!”
Why did the retard cross the road?
He never made it!
Q: What do you get when you cross Raggedy Ann with the Pillsbury Dough Boy?
A: A red-headed bitch with a yeast infection.
Hello! Why did the duck cross the road? To prove he wasn't chicken!
What do you get when you cross a vampire with a teacher?
Lots of blood tests!
Guess what you get when you cross a dark side and your king?
Why did the kid cross the playground? To get to the other slide!
Why did the rooster cross the road?
To Cock-A-Doodle Die. Now you have a rooster pancake. My favorite. ^^
Why did the chickens cross the road?
To get to KFC.
Why did Pinocchio cross the road?
To get to the other lied.