Crime jokes
Q: Why did the cat get arrested?
A: He was caught littering.
What did the bee say after the execution? "The criminal has been beeheaded!"
Why did the orphan commit crimes? To know what it's like to be wanted.
What does Jeffrey Dahmer and Travis Scott have in common?
Eight dead people.
Some people think prison is one word, but to criminals, it’s a whole sentence.
Memes
What does Johnny Depp hate about driving a car?
He can't drink and drive.
Why does Batman cover half of his face? To let the police know that he's white.
What do you call terrorists in a wheelchair?
An RCXD.
There was a little kid crying in the park today. I asked him where his parents were. Now I realize, man, I love my job.
Q: What did Chris Brown say when he first saw Rhianna?
A: I'd hit that.
Dude,
if you stab a cereal box, will that make you a cereal killer?
Did you hear that Michael Jackson once got food poisoning?
He ate 12-year-old nuts.
What do you call a murderer with two butts? An assassin.
Why do orphans kill people so they can finally be wanted?
I decided to take my mother-in-law out the other day. I love being a hitman.
What's the difference between me and a registered sex offender?
I am not registered.
Are you a white van? Because I would love to put children in you.
What is the day parents stopped fearing for their little boys? June 25, dead pedo day.
What is Michael Jackson's favorite snack? 5 year old whiners.
Guy: "Can I tell you a joke?"
Spiderman: "Yes."
Guy: "You only have 11 months on your calendar."
Spiderman: "Why?"
Guy: *holds up knife* "Because I murdered May."