Crime jokes
An officer confronts two congressmen.
He informs them, \"I’m looking for a couple of child molesters.\"
The two look at each other, turn to the officer and exclaim, \"Sure! We’ll do it!\"
If you are what you eat,
why is Jeffrey Dahmer white?
What is the best feeling for an orphan when he plays Grand Theft Auto?
When he is wanted!
Jeffrey Dahmer and his mother are having dinner.
His mother says, “I don’t like your friends.”
Then Jeff says, “You can eat the potatoes.”
What is a pedophile's favorite piano note?
A Minor.
Memes
Why do prepubescent orphan girls love pedophiles? Because they get to call someone “Daddy”.
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 broke into a daycare and ate 12 children before burning the building down.
Found this girl in Hawaii.
Put a stick up her ass and she said, "Ayi."
What did the duck say to the drug dealer?
Gimme some of that quack!
Who are the best at bowling?
Terrorists, they always throw strikes.
An eight-year-old girl struggles to breathe as she lies on a hospital bed and waits for the doctor to come. After the doctor comes, he pulls his cock out of her mouth, and she can breathe much better.
What’s the difference between a child and someone who has been kidnapped?
One of them is a domesticated pet.
The terrorists said over the intercom, "We're coming up to our destination, so we can't go over it, we can't go under, we have to go through it."
Did you hear about the dwarf that had his wallet stolen? Just how low can you get?
I watch my parents sleep with a knife in my hands. Only got caught once.
What is the difference between orphans and serial killers?
Serial killers are wanted.
The real dead hooker joke is on all of us from the Fraser Valley in BC. You know damn well each and everyone of us ate that Pickton hooker pork. Considering it stretching from the 80's-2000's, pretty sure he got 4 generations of Valley folk with that Pickton pork.
Why are half the orphans missing? Because I took them, of course! :]
Why do orphans play GTA so much?
Because they can be wanted for once.
A man robs a bank and asks a woman, "Did you see that?"
She says, "Yes." So the man shoots her.
He leaves the bank and sees a couple. He asks, "Did you see that?" The husband said, "No, but my wife did!"