Crime

Crime jokes

Woman

    • So, I was in the woods the other day raping this woman when she screamed, 'Please! Think of my children!'

    I thought, 'Ooo, you kinky bitch.'

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    • Rapist

    • 90 percent of women kiss with their eyes closed, which is why it's so difficult to identify a rapist.

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    • Crime memes

    Pervert

    • Did you guys see on the news where they arrested that pervert at the Michaels Crafts store?

    He was running around completely naked and had sprinkled glitter all over his testicles. I guess it was pretty nuts.

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    • Man

    • A foreign man came to America not knowing a word of English and right away began looking for a job. He became a chorus teacher and learned to say, "Mi-mi-mi-mi-mi!" After that he joined the Army and learned to say, "Yes sir!" After that he worked at a restaurant and learned to say, "Forks and knives, forks and knives!" After that he worked at a candy store and picked up the words, "Goody-goody gumdrops!"

    A few weeks later, there was a murder in the area and he was the first person to be interrogated by the police. The interrogation went as follows:

    Policeman: "Who killed the man?" Foreign man: "Mi-mi-mi-mi-mi!" Policeman: "Did you kill the man?" Foreign man: "Yes sir!" Policeman: "What did you use to kill him?" Foreign man: "Forks and knives, forks and knives!" Policeman: "You're under arrest." Foreign man: "Goody-goody gumdrops!"

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    • Rape

    • If you see a woman get raped, don't bother helping. After all, they are independent and need no man.

    Cheer on the rapist if you want.

    Rape

    • A woman has been raped by a man. She calls the police, and a policeman shows up.

    Woman: "Please help, officer! I have been raped!"

    Officer: "No problem, ma'am, I will just unrape you."

    Woman: "What? Unrape me? How?"

    Officer proceeds to bring back the rapist and forces the woman to rape the rapist back in order to cancel out the initial rape.

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    • Rape

    • If I were alone on an island with Camilla Cabello, and we were never going to escape, I'd rape her. I mean, what is she going to do? Tell someone?

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    • Woman

    • What do you call a dead woman in the back of your car?

    Idk, I just have a couple in the backseat.

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    • Rape

    • What do you do if you see someone raping your girlfriend? Help out. There is no way she can fight both of you. Then, find the poor man a lawyer.

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    • Domestic Violence

    • I do consider Johnny Depp to be a victim of domestic violence.

    Just like how I consider a children's hospital run by Michael Jackson and a retirement home run by Harold Shipman to be both safe places to be in.

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