Crime

Crime jokes

Murder

A teenager went into a creepy house with his 3 friends. Only 2 came out. Where are the others?

(Getting brutally murdered.)

Party

What do you call a party planned by Bill Cosby and Jeffrey Epstein?

A high school pill party.

Kidnapping

What’s the difference between a child and someone who has been kidnapped?

One of them is a domesticated pet.

Memes

Bank robbery

A man robs a bank and asks a woman, "Did you see that?"

She says, "Yes." So the man shoots her.

He leaves the bank and sees a couple. He asks, "Did you see that?" The husband said, "No, but my wife did!"

Hooker

The real dead hooker joke is on all of us from the Fraser Valley in BC. You know damn well each and everyone of us ate that Pickton hooker pork. Considering it stretching from the 80's-2000's, pretty sure he got 4 generations of Valley folk with that Pickton pork.

Knife

I watch my parents sleep with a knife in my hands. Only got caught once.

Orphan

What is the difference between orphans and serial killers?

Serial killers are wanted.

Terrorist

The terrorists said over the intercom, "We're coming up to our destination, so we can't go over it, we can't go under, we have to go through it."

Dwarf

Did you hear about the dwarf that had his wallet stolen? Just how low can you get?

People

Most people call it grave robbing...

I prefer to call it cryptocurrency.

Girl

Found this girl in Hawaii.

Put a stick up her ass and she said, "Ayi."

Daycare

Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 broke into a daycare and ate 12 children before burning the building down.

Batman

Why does Batman cover half of his face? To let the police know that he's white.

Quack

What did the duck say to the drug dealer?

Gimme some of that quack!

Orphan

What is the best feeling for an orphan when he plays Grand Theft Auto?

When he is wanted!