Crime jokes
Say what you want about Jeffery Dahmer, but he always managed to get a head.
Roses are red, Epstein's face turned blue.
Trump's on that list, And there's nothing he can do.
A guy gets home from work to see his girlfriend packing, and he asks her why she is packing. The girl says, "Because I found out you're a pedophile." The guy goes, "A pedophile?" And she says, "Yes." The guy goes, "That's a big word for a 12-year-old."
Why is 7 afraid of 6?
Because 7 is a vegetarian and 6 is a cannibal.
Dear Victims... äh Passengers, we are flying now from Ryadh to New York. Amazing Building... äh Amazing City. There's online, but 2000 there were two Towers... äh Restaurants. We hijack the plane... äh Hi Jack. Jack is my co-pilot, and I said hello. Don‘t scream... History Repea... äh... History never comes back, we are now flying back to the Airport. 💀
Memes
Vince Li doesn't eat comedians. He says they taste funny.
Q. What do you get when you cross Vince Li with a bus? A. A whole lot of people who wished they'd missed the bus that day.
The USA has school shootings. We Canadians have bus beheadings.
What do you call a Japanese car thief?
Tommy took a motor.
If a woman named Susan gets murdered, is it considered a Sue-icide?
What do Israel and Epstein have in common?
"Look at that, time to blow up some kids."
Smoking a fag in Britain: 🚬
Smoking a fag in America: hate crime.
When a redhead commits a mass shooting, does the headline read, "Ginger snaps"?
Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 was a registered *sex* offender.
Q: What’s the difference between a sleeping lady and an onion?
A: One doesn’t scream when you try to chop it up.
I learned that a strangler was targeting me.
All I could think was, "You’ve got to be choking me!"
What did one detective say to the other detective?
"Disguise is lookin' suspicious."
Osama Bin Laden thrown in ocean!
People who helped with the Twin Towers destruction: ...
So, one day Kylin Banks was playing football. Then he saw Violet. After he saw her, he got bricked up. Then he ran after her and rubbed his pickle all over her. She was so happy.
Kid: Hey, Mum, why are we pushing the car off the cliff?
Mum: Shut up, son, you’ll wake your father!