Crime jokes
Where do pedophiles go hunting?
Elementary schools.
What did the pedophile say to the nutcracker?
"Aren't you a little too young to be doing that?"
What shoes does a pedophile wear?
White vans.
Greg fucking steals toes!
Greg is a pedo.
What's the hardest part about being a paedophile?
Trying to fit in.
Someone burgled my house the other day. It was terrible.
They ripped all of the front and back pages of my dictionaries. Things went from bad to worse.
What do you call a pedophile who's dying? You.
Ever heard of the band "Nothing but Thieves"?
Yeah, it's called RobberBand.
What do you call a gay drive by?
A fruit roll up.
What's a pedophile's favorite place to go in?
Kum and Go.
Who make hard candy for the kids?
Solve.
Little girls are like basic math. If they're under 13, you do them in your head.
I once asked a sketchy man at a bar for some relationship advice. He simply replied, "They're all dead hookers once they're in the trunk."
Pedophiles are fucking immature assholes.
Two pedos are on the beach.
One pedo said, "Hey, get out of my son!"
What sort of file turns a one inch hole into a two inch hole?
A pedophile.
What's the leading cause of pedophilia? Sexy children.
Q: What's a pedophile's favorite thing about Halloween?
A: Free delivery.
What was the pedophile charged with when he was arrested? A minor offense.