Crime jokes
Statistics show that 1 in 3 people live next to a pedophile. However, I think that's a lie because I just live next to 2 stunning 8-year-olds.
Why do I carry pepper spray?
Just in case of as-SAULT.
Why did the bank robber shoot the man with no arms?
Because he told the man to put his hands up.
Mosely in a white van.
Someone stole my toilet, and the police have nothing to go on.
I like my girls how I like my wine, 12 years locked in the basement.
Two pedophiles talking to each other:
"Do you got two fives for one ten?"
What is a pedophile's favorite part of a hockey game?
Before the first period.
Q: What's a pedophile's favorite place to eat?
A: Schools because there is a wide variety of choices.
Why was the guitarist arrested?
He fingered a minor.
What do you call a psychic dwarf on the run? A small medium at large.
A blind guy shot up a town.
I guess he couldn’t see the road to heaven.
Did you hear about the fortune telling dwarf that escaped from prison?
Reports say there's a small medium at large!
Curiosity killed the cat.
But for a while, I was a suspect.
What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison?
A small medium at large!
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered 6 offender.
All Mia needs to destroy the evil young girl in Resident Evil 7 Biohazard, was using a pedophile instead of serum.
OK, there are at least 3 pedophiles in your neighborhood.
But there are no pedophiles in my neighborhood; there are only three 10-year-old girls with juicy asses.
Did you hear about the ninja pedophile? No one saw him coming.
What’s a pedophile’s favorite shoe? White vans.